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[@coldhealing](/creator/twitter/coldhealing)
"Going to the grocery store on a Monday night after work. My life is a David Foster Wallace commencement speech"  
![@coldhealing Avatar](https://lunarcrush.com/gi/w:16/cr:twitter::846921210122395648.png) [@coldhealing](/creator/x/coldhealing) on [X](/post/tweet/1944877562792202379) 2025-07-14 21:51:59 UTC 81.3K followers, 35.6K engagements


"The Christ the Redeemer statue outside Rio de Janeiro is listed as one of the seven wonders of the world by far the youngest because Brazil had a massive get-out-the-vote effort for a text message poll in 2007 to get it on the list"  
![@coldhealing Avatar](https://lunarcrush.com/gi/w:16/cr:twitter::846921210122395648.png) [@coldhealing](/creator/x/coldhealing) on [X](/post/tweet/1944038456432505171) 2025-07-12 14:17:41 UTC 81.3K followers, 13.3K engagements


"Sort of loving this girl's feminist take for fossil fuels"  
![@coldhealing Avatar](https://lunarcrush.com/gi/w:16/cr:twitter::846921210122395648.png) [@coldhealing](/creator/x/coldhealing) on [X](/post/tweet/1947680980422029555) 2025-07-22 15:31:46 UTC 81.3K followers, 98.1K engagements


"@MrMenesthius Matthew I don't think you don't understand me or many other things in the world"  
![@coldhealing Avatar](https://lunarcrush.com/gi/w:16/cr:twitter::846921210122395648.png) [@coldhealing](/creator/x/coldhealing) on [X](/post/tweet/1947633198826942617) 2025-07-22 12:21:54 UTC 81.3K followers, XXX engagements


"It's ok for catholic girls to not know how to spell canon"  
![@coldhealing Avatar](https://lunarcrush.com/gi/w:16/cr:twitter::846921210122395648.png) [@coldhealing](/creator/x/coldhealing) on [X](/post/tweet/1947822721280450859) 2025-07-23 00:55:00 UTC 81.3K followers, 14.8K engagements


"When I was XX I was abruptly promoted from bagger to janitor at Kroger because the prior janitor was fired for sexual harassment. I received no training. My first day I left a giant puddle on the floor while cleaning up a small spill because I didn't know how to use a mop"  
![@coldhealing Avatar](https://lunarcrush.com/gi/w:16/cr:twitter::846921210122395648.png) [@coldhealing](/creator/x/coldhealing) on [X](/post/tweet/1945499609163284966) 2025-07-16 15:03:47 UTC 81.3K followers, 6242 engagements


"@ferald_gord The people who live in the 19th century colonials all hate their wives and jobs and kids and the people who live in the exurbs blissfully go to barcades"  
![@coldhealing Avatar](https://lunarcrush.com/gi/w:16/cr:twitter::846921210122395648.png) [@coldhealing](/creator/x/coldhealing) on [X](/post/tweet/1947051339499938119) 2025-07-20 21:49:48 UTC 81.2K followers, 8140 engagements


"@BUNNlCULA In my imagination all Salesforce Towers are one entity sprouting out of the earth connected by tubes beneath the ground like the mycelium of a mushroom but I understand that the reality is more complex than that"  
![@coldhealing Avatar](https://lunarcrush.com/gi/w:16/cr:twitter::846921210122395648.png) [@coldhealing](/creator/x/coldhealing) on [X](/post/tweet/1945532900973121556) 2025-07-16 17:16:04 UTC 81.3K followers, 1852 engagements


"To be fair Stacey Abrams probably did not ChatGPT this herself. One of her staffers did. The American left has been using the equivalent of ChatGPT (staffers phoning in trite low-effort quotes) for decades"  
![@coldhealing Avatar](https://lunarcrush.com/gi/w:16/cr:twitter::846921210122395648.png) [@coldhealing](/creator/x/coldhealing) on [X](/post/tweet/1945151565360156995) 2025-07-15 16:00:47 UTC 81.3K followers, 16.8K engagements


"Ozzy Osbourne's Crazy Train is a song you most deeply feel when you're under XX years old and male. Sitting in the crowd at a baseball game listening to it over the stadium speakers thinking "wow what if a train was crazy""  
![@coldhealing Avatar](https://lunarcrush.com/gi/w:16/cr:twitter::846921210122395648.png) [@coldhealing](/creator/x/coldhealing) on [X](/post/tweet/1947763191179858334) 2025-07-22 20:58:27 UTC 81.3K followers, 184.2K engagements


"Kind of entranced by the high school class of 2027 Mississippi State committed punter who recently converted to Islam"  
![@coldhealing Avatar](https://lunarcrush.com/gi/w:16/cr:twitter::846921210122395648.png) [@coldhealing](/creator/x/coldhealing) on [X](/post/tweet/1944934133387682046) 2025-07-15 01:36:47 UTC 81.3K followers, 145.7K engagements


"San Francisco polyamory dares to test if women are more satisfied by 10100 shrimp than one man"  
![@coldhealing Avatar](https://lunarcrush.com/gi/w:16/cr:twitter::846921210122395648.png) [@coldhealing](/creator/x/coldhealing) on [X](/post/tweet/1947407926660108510) 2025-07-21 21:26:45 UTC 81.3K followers, 6313 engagements


"I didn't realize that the business model of Bloomberg was just a groupchat that you pay $30000/yr to join until recently"  
![@coldhealing Avatar](https://lunarcrush.com/gi/w:16/cr:twitter::846921210122395648.png) [@coldhealing](/creator/x/coldhealing) on [X](/post/tweet/1947704536543727862) 2025-07-22 17:05:22 UTC 81.3K followers, 333.8K engagements


"The modern equivalents to medieval alchemists alone in their tower self-identify as Sheldon from the Big Bang Theory"  
![@coldhealing Avatar](https://lunarcrush.com/gi/w:16/cr:twitter::846921210122395648.png) [@coldhealing](/creator/x/coldhealing) on [X](/post/tweet/1948025016861569337) 2025-07-23 14:18:51 UTC 81.3K followers, 14.8K engagements


"The Tesla Diner should have served soy burgers and kale salads and sweet potato fries but our world has gone down a dark perverted path"  
![@coldhealing Avatar](https://lunarcrush.com/gi/w:16/cr:twitter::846921210122395648.png) [@coldhealing](/creator/x/coldhealing) on [X](/post/tweet/1947812180373737727) 2025-07-23 00:13:07 UTC 81.2K followers, XXX engagements


"You say Harry Potter we say Hal Incandenza You say Hogwarts we say Enfield Tennis Academy You say quidditch we say eschaton You say Trump is like Voldemort we say Trump is like Johnny Gentle We 👏 are 👏 not 👏 the 👏 same 👏"  
![@coldhealing Avatar](https://lunarcrush.com/gi/w:16/cr:twitter::846921210122395648.png) [@coldhealing](/creator/x/coldhealing) on [X](/post/tweet/1946274867956912376) 2025-07-18 18:24:23 UTC 81.3K followers, 7939 engagements


"When you're woke you get girls with blue nails putting their hands around your neck instead of girls with red nails"  
![@coldhealing Avatar](https://lunarcrush.com/gi/w:16/cr:twitter::846921210122395648.png) [@coldhealing](/creator/x/coldhealing) on [X](/post/tweet/1944498665936007416) 2025-07-13 20:46:23 UTC 81.3K followers, 70.1K engagements


"First I went to happy hour at the Palantir office. Then I headed to chess club at the rooftop pool bar which was a pretty dope place to watch the sunset. After a quick street falafel pit stop I took the L train to Williamsburg for some much needed ketamine at Priscilla's place"  
![@coldhealing Avatar](https://lunarcrush.com/gi/w:16/cr:twitter::846921210122395648.png) [@coldhealing](/creator/x/coldhealing) on [X](/post/tweet/1946289583676649813) 2025-07-18 19:22:51 UTC 81.3K followers, 20.6K engagements


"Hey I love your tweets. I was just checking out the Instagram linked in your bio and I have to say your photography is great. Would you like to go for a platonic matcha walk sometime"  
![@coldhealing Avatar](https://lunarcrush.com/gi/w:16/cr:twitter::846921210122395648.png) [@coldhealing](/creator/x/coldhealing) on [X](/post/tweet/1945934501139415132) 2025-07-17 19:51:53 UTC 81.3K followers, 11.2K engagements


"You're missing the detail where for XX years you hang out with your friends and go for walks after finishing with studying/working for the day"  
![@coldhealing Avatar](https://lunarcrush.com/gi/w:16/cr:twitter::846921210122395648.png) [@coldhealing](/creator/x/coldhealing) on [X](/post/tweet/1944111414282793438) 2025-07-12 19:07:35 UTC 81.3K followers, 235.7K engagements


"@river_is_nice People went insane because they were forced to stay inside their house not because they got free money"  
![@coldhealing Avatar](https://lunarcrush.com/gi/w:16/cr:twitter::846921210122395648.png) [@coldhealing](/creator/x/coldhealing) on [X](/post/tweet/1947657111196070237) 2025-07-22 13:56:55 UTC 81.3K followers, 5240 engagements


"In another life I would have really liked every day to be another wonderful secret with you"  
![@coldhealing Avatar](https://lunarcrush.com/gi/w:16/cr:twitter::846921210122395648.png) [@coldhealing](/creator/x/coldhealing) on [X](/post/tweet/1946589728238682222) 2025-07-19 15:15:31 UTC 81.3K followers, 10.3K engagements


"You need to grinding so you can fund your future wife's acai bowl shop that employs X people including a social media manager"  
![@coldhealing Avatar](https://lunarcrush.com/gi/w:16/cr:twitter::846921210122395648.png) [@coldhealing](/creator/x/coldhealing) on [X](/post/tweet/1942178481716043968) 2025-07-07 11:06:48 UTC 81.3K followers, 3.1M engagements


"One thing I've learned X years into leaving the Midwest for New York is that the coastal elites really are doing satanic pedophile rituals but they aren't fulfilling. Doesn't make them happy. They get home from Comet Pizza basement adrenochrome night and still feel alone"  
![@coldhealing Avatar](https://lunarcrush.com/gi/w:16/cr:twitter::846921210122395648.png) [@coldhealing](/creator/x/coldhealing) on [X](/post/tweet/1944067302275653633) 2025-07-12 16:12:18 UTC 81.3K followers, 17.3K engagements


"I'm too smart for a therapist but I don't think that's a pretentious thing to say at all. I think a lot of people significantly dumber than me are also too smart for a therapist"  
![@coldhealing Avatar](https://lunarcrush.com/gi/w:16/cr:twitter::846921210122395648.png) [@coldhealing](/creator/x/coldhealing) on [X](/post/tweet/1944771846198452559) 2025-07-14 14:51:54 UTC 81.3K followers, 163K engagements


"Modern Americans can't read or write XX words so they had to add the painting title to get the word count up"  
![@coldhealing Avatar](https://lunarcrush.com/gi/w:16/cr:twitter::846921210122395648.png) [@coldhealing](/creator/x/coldhealing) on [X](/post/tweet/1948378504015327404) 2025-07-24 13:43:29 UTC 81.3K followers, XXX engagements


"4chan was a necessary part of the internet ecosystem 4chan made you aware you were a loser. Nowadays kids are commenting things that would have been on 4chan on Instagram Reels and don't even know that. It's fine they think those things but they shouldn't think they're normal"  
![@coldhealing Avatar](https://lunarcrush.com/gi/w:16/cr:twitter::846921210122395648.png) [@coldhealing](/creator/x/coldhealing) on [X](/post/tweet/1941596160042336283) 2025-07-05 20:32:52 UTC 81.3K followers, 1.7M engagements


"I start laughing every time I see one of the Amazon motorized delivery vehicles that's 4x bigger than a bike and as fast as a car but for some reason is allowed to drive in bike lanes. The future is funny"  
![@coldhealing Avatar](https://lunarcrush.com/gi/w:16/cr:twitter::846921210122395648.png) [@coldhealing](/creator/x/coldhealing) on [X](/post/tweet/1944879875619480034) 2025-07-14 22:01:11 UTC 81.3K followers, 23K engagements


"I'm once again eating Chipotle in the shade of Salesforce Tower. I'm surrounded by America's ambitious young men in blue long-sleeve collared shirts despite the XX degree heat acquiring their bowls and then going back to work. I'm different from them though. I don't want to buy cocaine this weekend or a house in Connecticut in ten years. I don't know what I want and I've been at peace with that for a while. Maybe they don't know what they want either. I shouldn't look for too much difference between them and me because we're both here taking the same actions in the present"  
![@coldhealing Avatar](https://lunarcrush.com/gi/w:16/cr:twitter::846921210122395648.png) [@coldhealing](/creator/x/coldhealing) on [X](/post/tweet/1945526790333534376) 2025-07-16 16:51:47 UTC 81.3K followers, 112.7K engagements


"I know infidelity is bad but being a CEO holding your VP of HR in your arms at a Coldplay concert has to feel so good. Sometimes love is wrong but still real"  
![@coldhealing Avatar](https://lunarcrush.com/gi/w:16/cr:twitter::846921210122395648.png) [@coldhealing](/creator/x/coldhealing) on [X](/post/tweet/1945865220280209756) 2025-07-17 15:16:35 UTC 81.3K followers, 9.8M engagements


"I don't mean to be mean to those of you who live in landlocked Applebee's America but my life is meaningfully more exciting and fulfilling because I live on the coast"  
![@coldhealing Avatar](https://lunarcrush.com/gi/w:16/cr:twitter::846921210122395648.png) [@coldhealing](/creator/x/coldhealing) on [X](/post/tweet/1945678054715465961) 2025-07-17 02:52:51 UTC 81.3K followers, 23.3K engagements


"@StephenKing Stephen the correct grammar in the second sentence would be "so are" as you're listing multiple items"  
![@coldhealing Avatar](https://lunarcrush.com/gi/w:16/cr:twitter::846921210122395648.png) [@coldhealing](/creator/x/coldhealing) on [X](/post/tweet/1945109750414205384) 2025-07-15 13:14:37 UTC 81.3K followers, 301.8K engagements


"@nw3 Taylor swift is famously pro-cheating"  
![@coldhealing Avatar](https://lunarcrush.com/gi/w:16/cr:twitter::846921210122395648.png) [@coldhealing](/creator/x/coldhealing) on [X](/post/tweet/1945897977161171023) 2025-07-17 17:26:45 UTC 81.3K followers, XXX engagements


"@jiratickets In New York you can walk three blocks without hitting a Sweetgreen"  
![@coldhealing Avatar](https://lunarcrush.com/gi/w:16/cr:twitter::846921210122395648.png) [@coldhealing](/creator/x/coldhealing) on [X](/post/tweet/1945582197278179630) 2025-07-16 20:31:57 UTC 81.3K followers, XXX engagements


"2040 population distribution predictions: -XX% brainless content zombies who are functionally illiterate cannot write a paragraph -X% Neo-Amish flip phone users -X% elites and superelites at algorithmic war with each other to steer the XX% to their whims"  
![@coldhealing Avatar](https://lunarcrush.com/gi/w:16/cr:twitter::846921210122395648.png) [@coldhealing](/creator/x/coldhealing) on [X](/post/tweet/1944761754057125956) 2025-07-14 14:11:48 UTC 81.3K followers, 32K engagements


"A CEO has an affair at a Coldplay concert and everyone in America knows. But if Bono had an affair at the AWS Summit no one would even notice. People pay attention to different places in different ways"  
![@coldhealing Avatar](https://lunarcrush.com/gi/w:16/cr:twitter::846921210122395648.png) [@coldhealing](/creator/x/coldhealing) on [X](/post/tweet/1945895513036824582) 2025-07-17 17:16:57 UTC 81.3K followers, 9399 engagements


"I've already graduated but I'm considering signing up for one of these dialogues and picking on a child I don't like to reduce his chances of getting into college"  
![@coldhealing Avatar](https://lunarcrush.com/gi/w:16/cr:twitter::846921210122395648.png) [@coldhealing](/creator/x/coldhealing) on [X](/post/tweet/1946244862707114098) 2025-07-18 16:25:09 UTC 81.3K followers, 23.4K engagements


"@stylishdawg $XXX team dinner are y'all going to chipotle and getting sides of chips and guac"  
![@coldhealing Avatar](https://lunarcrush.com/gi/w:16/cr:twitter::846921210122395648.png) [@coldhealing](/creator/x/coldhealing) on [X](/post/tweet/1947866002273825241) 2025-07-23 03:46:59 UTC 81.3K followers, XXX engagements


"@femaleweezerfan @spero1ucem She forgets her credit card when the two of you are going for a platonic matcha walk it happens to the best of us"  
![@coldhealing Avatar](https://lunarcrush.com/gi/w:16/cr:twitter::846921210122395648.png) [@coldhealing](/creator/x/coldhealing) on [X](/post/tweet/1945933563255202044) 2025-07-17 19:48:09 UTC 81.2K followers, 2606 engagements


"Baby the sword tattoo between your breasts and the doodled star on your arm will look so beautiful when you are XX. I cannot wait to see"  
![@coldhealing Avatar](https://lunarcrush.com/gi/w:16/cr:twitter::846921210122395648.png) [@coldhealing](/creator/x/coldhealing) on [X](/post/tweet/1945194320220315939) 2025-07-15 18:50:40 UTC 81.3K followers, 84.2K engagements