[GUEST ACCESS MODE: Data is scrambled or limited to provide examples. Make requests using your API key to unlock full data. Check https://lunarcrush.ai/auth for authentication information.]  Bloody Aardvark [@AardvarkBloody](/creator/twitter/AardvarkBloody) on x 7352 followers Created: 2025-07-12 10:43:18 UTC BREAKING: President Cyril Ramaphosa places South Africa on suspension for corruption. During a televised address Ramaphosa regally intoned: "My praise singers and back-up chorus have annointed me as a genius, but that is, regrettably, not the truth. I'm simply a shrewd opportunist. The truth is: my fellow South Africans, you are a bunch of fucking idiots. "But to call you 'idiots', 'twats' or 'imbeciles' is putting it mildly. I'll pretend you understand this: at the physics department of Wits University is an electron microscope that can visualise the particles that make up atoms: protons, neutrons, etc. The tiniest building blocks of the universe. Even with that microscope, I would not be able to locate your brains. "What type of... organism doesn't realise that supporting bottom-of-the-barrel bozos and mobsters year in and out will not improve their plight? Surely, by now, you have an inkling that my comrades and I are in this only for ourselves? "My comrades and I are ROTFL that for years we've been able to dish up the same steaming pile of bullshit and the lot of you STILL queue up for your ration. We dine fine, while you have the luxury of smelling our glorious bowel movement. "A tapeworm is not corrupt. A vulture is not corrupt. Toxic waste is not corrupt. The ANC is not corrupt. We are simply conforming to our parasitic nature! Ramaphosa majestically concluded: "My compatriots, you are the ones who enable us. You are a scourge upon yourselves and should know way fucking better than to trust me. That's why I'm placing all of YOU on suspension for the challenges you, and our country, face. Now GTFOH until the next family meeting."  XXXXX engagements  **Related Topics** [south africa](/topic/south-africa) [Post Link](https://x.com/AardvarkBloody/status/1943984506567864787)
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Bloody Aardvark @AardvarkBloody on x 7352 followers
Created: 2025-07-12 10:43:18 UTC
BREAKING: President Cyril Ramaphosa places South Africa on suspension for corruption.
During a televised address Ramaphosa regally intoned: "My praise singers and back-up chorus have annointed me as a genius, but that is, regrettably, not the truth. I'm simply a shrewd opportunist. The truth is: my fellow South Africans, you are a bunch of fucking idiots.
"But to call you 'idiots', 'twats' or 'imbeciles' is putting it mildly. I'll pretend you understand this: at the physics department of Wits University is an electron microscope that can visualise the particles that make up atoms: protons, neutrons, etc. The tiniest building blocks of the universe. Even with that microscope, I would not be able to locate your brains.
"What type of... organism doesn't realise that supporting bottom-of-the-barrel bozos and mobsters year in and out will not improve their plight? Surely, by now, you have an inkling that my comrades and I are in this only for ourselves?
"My comrades and I are ROTFL that for years we've been able to dish up the same steaming pile of bullshit and the lot of you STILL queue up for your ration. We dine fine, while you have the luxury of smelling our glorious bowel movement.
"A tapeworm is not corrupt. A vulture is not corrupt. Toxic waste is not corrupt. The ANC is not corrupt. We are simply conforming to our parasitic nature!
Ramaphosa majestically concluded: "My compatriots, you are the ones who enable us. You are a scourge upon yourselves and should know way fucking better than to trust me. That's why I'm placing all of YOU on suspension for the challenges you, and our country, face. Now GTFOH until the next family meeting."
XXXXX engagements
Related Topics south africa