# ![@BamaSaltyMarine Avatar](https://lunarcrush.com/gi/w:26/cr:twitter::1429516329632022535.png) @BamaSaltyMarine Old Salty Marine

Old Salty Marine posts on X about in the, if you, to the, money the most. They currently have [------] followers and [---] posts still getting attention that total [---------] engagements in the last [--] hours.

### Engagements: [---------] [#](/creator/twitter::1429516329632022535/interactions)
![Engagements Line Chart](https://lunarcrush.com/gi/w:600/cr:twitter::1429516329632022535/c:line/m:interactions.svg)

- [--] Week [---------] +46%
- [--] Month [----------] +243%
- [--] Months [----------] +340%
- [--] Year [----------] +1,800%

### Mentions: [--] [#](/creator/twitter::1429516329632022535/posts_active)
![Mentions Line Chart](https://lunarcrush.com/gi/w:600/cr:twitter::1429516329632022535/c:line/m:posts_active.svg)

- [--] Week [---] -28%
- [--] Month [---] +26%
- [--] Months [-----] +179%
- [--] Year [-----] -18%

### Followers: [------] [#](/creator/twitter::1429516329632022535/followers)
![Followers Line Chart](https://lunarcrush.com/gi/w:600/cr:twitter::1429516329632022535/c:line/m:followers.svg)

- [--] Week [------] +1.90%
- [--] Month [------] +11%
- [--] Months [------] +74%
- [--] Year [------] +236%

### CreatorRank: [-----] [#](/creator/twitter::1429516329632022535/influencer_rank)
![CreatorRank Line Chart](https://lunarcrush.com/gi/w:600/cr:twitter::1429516329632022535/c:line/m:influencer_rank.svg)

### Social Influence

**Social category influence**
[finance](/list/finance)  5.38% [countries](/list/countries)  3.59% [celebrities](/list/celebrities)  3.14% [stocks](/list/stocks)  2.24% [luxury brands](/list/luxury-brands)  0.9% [automotive brands](/list/automotive-brands)  0.9% [ncaa football](/list/ncaa-football)  0.45% [pga golfers](/list/pga-golfers)  0.45% [musicians](/list/musicians)  0.45% [technology brands](/list/technology-brands)  0.45%

**Social topic influence**
[in the](/topic/in-the) 8.97%, [if you](/topic/if-you) 8.07%, [to the](/topic/to-the) 4.93%, [money](/topic/money) 3.14%, [the first](/topic/the-first) #3637, [night](/topic/night) 3.14%, [sir](/topic/sir) 2.24%, [how to](/topic/how-to) 2.24%, [awesome](/topic/awesome) #537, [guess](/topic/guess) 1.79%

**Top accounts mentioned or mentioned by**
[@s_berry_82](/creator/undefined) [@chazluz95](/creator/undefined) [@kuronosaisei](/creator/undefined) [@jeanpau28829583](/creator/undefined) [@evolnemesis](/creator/undefined) [@statikdj](/creator/undefined) [@gfc_4547](/creator/undefined) [@grok](/creator/undefined) [@whatfutility](/creator/undefined) [@suri30044713231](/creator/undefined) [@godby_richard](/creator/undefined) [@quattromkii](/creator/undefined) [@galaxyyyyy71005](/creator/undefined) [@nfl](/creator/undefined) [@forgedbyad](/creator/undefined) [@hammerstone911](/creator/undefined) [@mikepilbean](/creator/undefined) [@ray_bluethunder](/creator/undefined) [@stackemupagain](/creator/undefined) [@angelah171717](/creator/undefined)
### Top Social Posts
Top posts by engagements in the last [--] hours

"Ladies being a cougar takes more than just being over [--] or [--] years old. You need your own house money and good credit. If you don't have that you're just a stray cat"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2017648273390006425)  2026-01-31T17:16Z 59.8K followers, 34.8K engagements


"Maturing is realizing that day drinking is actually responsible. You start at [--] drunk by [--] bed at 8:30 and you feel great the next day. Follow me for more good advice"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2020885644352922007)  2026-02-09T15:40Z 59.8K followers, 248.6K engagements


"Someone once asked an old man "Sir why did you never get married in your entire life" He smiled and said "It goes back to my youth. Once I was at a party. By mistake I stepped on the hanging scarf of a young woman standing in front of me. She spun around like an angry snake and roared like a lioness Bloody hell Are you blind or what I immediately started stammering and apologizing. Then she looked at my face. and suddenly in a very sweet voice she said Oh I'm sorry. I thought you were my husband. That moment. I completely lost the courage to ever get married"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2021971010333954497)  2026-02-12T15:33Z 59.8K followers, 48.3K engagements


"People don't realize what actually happens when the illegal population is gone. Suddenly Americans start getting real raises again. Hospitals stop drowning in overcrowded ERs. Schools breathe class sizes finally return to something sane. Insurance bills drop instead of climbing every year. Young families can actually buy homes. Grocery prices level out because the welfare load crushing the system anymore. DMV lines move Traffic lightens. Neighborhoods calm down. Crime stats shift in the right direction for the first time in decades. Organ transplant lists move faster. Teenagers get the jobs"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2018843820025172444)  2026-02-04T00:27Z 59.8K followers, 720.7K engagements


"Still the greatest picture of Hillary Ive ever seen"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2020987755187274115)  2026-02-09T22:26Z 59.8K followers, [----] engagements


""We shall have no real hope to survive the enemies arranged against us until we hang the traitors lurking among us." Thomas Paine"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2021623025184251947)  2026-02-11T16:31Z 59.8K followers, 33.5K engagements


"I would like to extend a HUGE thank you to everyone that sent prayers for my wife and the bee sting. Im happy to report that.you didnt read the entire post"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2022031442495340689)  2026-02-12T19:33Z 59.8K followers, 16.3K engagements


"Roses are red Ill fix you some sushi Spread those legs So I can look at your kuchi"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2022378181072740734)  2026-02-13T18:31Z 59.8K followers, [----] engagements


"Scientific tests prove the most intelligent DNA ends up in women. Unfortunately 98% of them spit it out"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2022703234352116084)  2026-02-14T16:03Z 59.8K followers, [----] engagements


"Guys dont ever piss off a short girl: They're like cute adorable tiny ninjas of death Who are at the perfect height to punch you in the balls"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2022709057048711265)  2026-02-14T16:26Z 59.8K followers, [----] engagements


"Pauls Wife gave birth to triplets. " How in Gods name did that happen says Paul. His wife replied "remember that time I was dry and we used 3-In-1-oil" " Holy Jesus says Paul I'm fucking glad we didn't Use WD40"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/1948044474128429436)  2025-07-23T15:36Z 59.1K followers, [----] engagements


"A lady approaches her priest and tells him "Father I have a problem. I have two female talking parrots but they only know how to say one thing." "What do they say" the priest inquired. "They only know how to say 'Hi we're prostitutes. Want to have some fun "That's terrible" the priest exclaimed "but I have a solution to your problem. Bring your two female parrots over to my house and I will put them with my two male talking parrots whom I taught to pray and read the bible. My parrots will teach your parrots to stop saying that terrible phrase and your female parrots will learn to praise and"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2000957846733602946)  2025-12-16T15:55Z 59.2K followers, 165.1K engagements


"Remember this Any pan can be a non-stick pan. If you non-cook in it Follow me for more good advice"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2015817758106067155)  2026-01-26T16:03Z 59.1K followers, [----] engagements


"43 years ago on this date Coach Bryant passed away He was my idol Although back then I couldnt watch every Alabama football game. I read the results in the news paper. I remember watching every Bowl game they played in on tv I was locking a gate to a wastewater plant I operated the afternoon I heard he had passed away I had tears in my eyes all the way home that day https://twitter.com/i/web/status/2015848519798566950 https://twitter.com/i/web/status/2015848519798566950"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2015848519798566950)  2026-01-26T18:05Z 59.3K followers, [----] engagements


"A Mafia Godfather finds out that his bookkeeper Enzo has cheated him out of [--] million bucks. His bookkeeper is deaf that was the reason he got the job in the first place. It was assumed that Enzo would hear nothing that he might have to testify about in court. When the Godfather goes to confront Enzo about his missing $10 million he takes along his lawyer who knows sign language. The Godfather tells the lawyer "Ask him where the [--] million bucks is that he embezzled from me." The lawyer using sign language asks Enzo where the money is. Enzo signs back "I don't know what you are talking"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2016191113380422138)  2026-01-27T16:46Z 58.6K followers, 1M engagements


"Winter Storm Pro Tip👇🏻👇🏻👇🏻 Notice how every grocery store runs out of milk bread and water but NEVER runs out Beer Beer has water in it and it has the hops that's in bread. You're welcome"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2016210287423062070)  2026-01-27T18:02Z 58.8K followers, [----] engagements


"WORLDS SHORTEST BOOKS MY BLACK GIRLFRIENDS by Tiger Woods THINGS I LOVE ABOUT MY COUNTRY by Jane Fonda & Michelle Obama THINGS I LOVE ABOUT BILL by Hillary Clinton THINGS I LOVE ABOUT HILLARY by Bill Clinton THINGS I CANT AFFORD by Bill Gates THINGS WE KNOW TO BE TRUE by Al Gore and John Kerry HOW TO DRINK AND DRIVE SAFELY by Ted Kennedy Agents TO ALL THE MEN WE HAVE LOVED BE by Rosie O'Donnell and Ellen Degeneres. HOW TO LIVE LIFE TO THE FULLEST by Dr Jack Kevorkian MY BOOK ON MORALS by Bill Clinton Introduction by Tiger Woods MY COMPLETE KNOWLEDGE OF MILITARY STRATEGY by Nancy Pelosi HOW TO"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2016620435560157510)  2026-01-28T21:12Z 58.8K followers, 92.1K engagements


"Ive thought of another thing Im going to do for Valentines Day Im going to send a Valentine card to some of my used to be Liberal friends The message will read Hi My Love I have flowers chocolate and wine ready for your arrival tonight at the Hotel The room number is [---] see you at [--] https://twitter.com/i/web/status/2016995268068069626 https://twitter.com/i/web/status/2016995268068069626"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2016995268068069626)  2026-01-29T22:02Z 59.1K followers, [----] engagements


"Bill Gates says a cow puts off more pollution than a car. Ok Billy I'll lock myself in a garage with a cow overnight. You lock yourself in in a gurage with a running car overnight. We will meet for breakfast in the morning to discuss the results"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2017265393350422844)  2026-01-30T15:55Z 59K followers, 741.9K engagements


"Do you think the guy that invented the Vibrator heard voices saying "if you build it they will come""  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2017270232641839163)  2026-01-30T16:14Z 59.1K followers, [----] engagements


"The truth is If it wasn't for Donald Trump winning. Americans NEVER would have known just how dirty the democrats really are. I'm so thankful it's finally all being exposed"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2017273239202840675)  2026-01-30T16:26Z 58.8K followers, 203.8K engagements


"Just spent the last hour in a Walmart parking lot. I spent the time leaving notes on random windshields. The note read I just tested positive for Herpes Call me when you get this Now I wait"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2017312625151873069)  2026-01-30T19:03Z 58.5K followers, [----] engagements


"This is fucking hilarious I had to use my phone to copy it in order to post it I didnt do the original but its too damn funny not to post Enjoy"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2017357117116514341)  2026-01-30T21:59Z 58.4K followers, [----] engagements


""THIS BULL MATED [--] TIMES LAST YEAR" My wife playfully nudged me in the ribs smiled and said He mated fifty time last year. We walked to the second pen which had a sign attached that said "THIS BULL MATED [---] TIMES LAST YEAR" My wife gave me a healthy jab grinned and said: "WOW That's more than twice a week You could learn something from that one" On the door to the third pen was a sign that said THIS BULL MATED [---] TIMES LAST YEAR. My wife was so exited that her elbow nearly broke my ribs and said: "That's once a day You could REALLY learn a lot from this one" I looked at her and said: "Go"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2017641515250565242)  2026-01-31T16:49Z 58.8K followers, 1.2M engagements


"My wife's female intuition is so highly developed she sometimes knows I'm wrong before I've even opened my mouth"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2017644972657258744)  2026-01-31T17:03Z 58.8K followers, [----] engagements


"I wonder if a butterfly has ever wanted a tattoo of a fat girl"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2017645933446529153)  2026-01-31T17:07Z 58.5K followers, [----] engagements


"Signs of being oldat Dairy Queen Me: medium Oreo blizzard please. Lady cashier-do you want a spoon Me sure what time do you get off"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2017647417894604923)  2026-01-31T17:13Z 58.5K followers, [----] engagements


"Go to the animal shelter for a dog and you're a Hero. Go to a woman's shelter for a girlfriend and everyone loses their minds"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2018001836720996672)  2026-02-01T16:41Z 58.8K followers, 204.4K engagements


"Studies show that people with high IQs tend to be lazy or something like that. I didn't read the whole article"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2018017840880669073)  2026-02-01T17:45Z 58.8K followers, 112K engagements


"Celine Dion has come out in support of farmers.by removing all the consonants from her name. ei ei o"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2018346005251461632)  2026-02-02T15:29Z 59.1K followers, [----] engagements


"Who makes more money a drug dealer or a prostitute A prostitute because she can wash her crack and reuse it"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2018347886384181281)  2026-02-02T15:36Z 59.4K followers, [----] engagements


"Two girls seated next to a guy on a plane. He wanted to be cool flirt and hook up. So he asked them Hi beautiful ladies.where are you flying to You are on the same plane going to the same place idiot"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2018348931554410889)  2026-02-02T15:40Z 59K followers, [----] engagements


"If the person who named Walkie Talkies named everything Stamps = Lickie Stickie Defibrillators = Hearty Starty Bumble bees = Fuzzy Buzzy Pregnancy test = Maybe Baby Bra =Breastie Nestie Fork= Stabby Grabby Socks = Feetie Heatie Hippo = Floatie Bloatie Nightmare = Screamy Dreamy"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2018359353728753887)  2026-02-02T16:22Z 58.8K followers, [----] engagements


"@US_Tax_Slave I dont know but I feel a time will soon come. Whether we fight or we surrender Ill never ever surrender My family members sacrificed too much for this country for me to ever give up"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2018393150419571158)  2026-02-02T18:36Z 59.1K followers, [----] engagements


"Kamala Harris saw her shadow on Ground Hog Day That means [--] more years of her not being President"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2018456786983137497)  2026-02-02T22:49Z 59.1K followers, [----] engagements


"Wow are you shitting me So disrespectful to the men and women that served in the military.especially to the Marines that fought at Iwo Jima Please send the @USMC to each of their households Explain how 🤬 disrespectful this is @BamaSaltyMarine Please send the @USMC to each of their households Explain how 🤬 disrespectful this is @BamaSaltyMarine"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2018471926491209738)  2026-02-02T23:49Z 59.1K followers, [----] engagements


"Another Awesome handmade knife Check out his shop My knife is handmade. Factory knives call it overqualified 😄 @BamaSaltyMarine https://t.co/vhaE8OxJDd My knife is handmade. Factory knives call it overqualified 😄 @BamaSaltyMarine https://t.co/vhaE8OxJDd"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2018473328462471201)  2026-02-02T23:55Z 59.4K followers, [----] engagements


"@StatikDj Fuck you"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2018502018352947356)  2026-02-03T01:49Z 58.4K followers, [---] engagements


"@ChrisVanHollen You fucking Democrats sold this country out to our enemies illegal immigrants and stole our tax dollars Time for you to sit your ass down and shut the fuck up"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2018513813205905688)  2026-02-03T02:36Z 59.4K followers, [----] engagements


"This needs to return to our education system Your final exam will be to figure out how to use an analog clock and a rotary phone. Don't worry. I have written the directions for you in cursive"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2018727174237229060)  2026-02-03T16:43Z 59.4K followers, [----] engagements


"Now I'm not saying I want [--] degree days and sweat running down my ass crack. But I sure wouldn't mind being able to piss outside without looking like I have innie"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2018727664261922847)  2026-02-03T16:45Z 59.1K followers, [----] engagements


"Me- remember back in the day when I was a real heartbreaker Wife-now the only thing you break is wind"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2018728340643782697)  2026-02-03T16:48Z 59.4K followers, [---] engagements


"We found a leaflet in our newspaper this morning which read "Are you an alcoholic Call now. We can help" My Wife insisted I make the call.So I called up. It was a liquor store offer: Buy [--] and get [--] free"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2018729051444092991)  2026-02-03T16:51Z 59.4K followers, 29.8K engagements


"I sleep naked so if YOU try to rob me in my sleep. Just know you are getting beat up by a naked dude"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2018729679239147554)  2026-02-03T16:53Z 59.4K followers, [----] engagements


"I hear that by law you need to turn on your headlights when it's raining in Sweden. How the hell am I supposed to know when it's raining in Sweden"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2018731924475326658)  2026-02-03T17:02Z 59.1K followers, [----] engagements


"Texting Trump to see when he's taking women's rights away Because I'm tired of her thinking she runs this house"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2018737307684347986)  2026-02-03T17:24Z 59.2K followers, [---] engagements


"My wife gained weight her so I bought her a dress [--] sizes below and said "I look forward to seeing you in it." So for my birthday this month she bought me a coffin"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2018738198864888265)  2026-02-03T17:27Z 59.4K followers, [----] engagements


"So the guy who wanted to slip his wife antibiotics for@ STD's he got on Epstein island l. Is the one entrusted to help get us all to take the jabs I get that right"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2018739794356904283)  2026-02-03T17:34Z 59.4K followers, [---] engagements


"Ladies if you get with a real man. You won't ever have to look at prices when I take you out. Because you can get anything you want off that McDonald's value menu"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2018742119674823006)  2026-02-03T17:43Z 59.1K followers, [----] engagements


"I was driving too fast and got pulled over by a policewoman. I opened my window and asked how much will this cost me She answered $80 I said Ok fine hop in I need bail money"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2018746494476562739)  2026-02-03T18:00Z 59.4K followers, 45.4K engagements


"While all of you are fighting over the deaths of [--] violent protestors. Remember the corrupt democrats funded and incited the violence that led to their deaths. All to hide all of their corruption and fraud Facts"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2018747281890238524)  2026-02-03T18:03Z 59.4K followers, [----] engagements


"Reposting from a post by black man Africans sold other black people into slavery and white people could've left black people as slaves but instead they freed them. Remember that next time you try to say all white people are racist. Love Beyond Color"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2018748035136708634)  2026-02-03T18:06Z 59.1K followers, [---] engagements


"The appearance of Zohran Mamani's mother Mira Nair in the Epstein files. Is proof that Zohran Mamdani's rise is neither accidental nor organic Every piece of politics is engineered"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2018749315116863559)  2026-02-03T18:11Z 59.2K followers, 21.5K engagements


"I'm thinking of writing a book of fish puns. So if you know of any good ones let minnow"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2018753007614034428)  2026-02-03T18:26Z 59.1K followers, [----] engagements


"One thing Ive learned from the Minnesota shootings of the two rioters Its the first time Democrats blamed the shooters and not the gun"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2018757220842778988)  2026-02-03T18:43Z 59.4K followers, 18.9K engagements


"We were different from todays [--] year olds We grew up fast A defining and haunting characteristic of the Vietnam War is the drastic demographic shift in the average age of the combatants compared to previous conflicts. While the average infantryman in W W II was approximately [--] years old widespread historical accounts indicate that the average age of the combat soldier in Vietnam dropped to just [--]. These young men many fresh out of high school were thrust into a massive operational theater that saw U.S. troop levels peak at over [------] personnel in [----]. Plucked directly from civilian life"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2018772343607218311)  2026-02-03T19:43Z 59.1K followers, [----] engagements


"@SenSanders So in other words you just want the world to revolve around you You want to be the sole decider of what people can own have work for talk about In other words you are a verified fucking communist"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2018788262467477769)  2026-02-03T20:46Z 59.1K followers, [----] engagements


"No one is asking you to stop being a Democrat Just stop supporting the pedophiles in your party Stop supporting abortions Stop supporting the mutilation of children Stop living off free shit Stop supporting Communists Stop rioting in our streets Stop supporting illegal immigrants that rape and murder Americans Stop supporting those that are stealing our tax dollars Now sit down and just shut the fuck up https://twitter.com/i/web/status/2018792252328333438 https://twitter.com/i/web/status/2018792252328333438"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2018792252328333438)  2026-02-03T21:02Z 59.1K followers, [----] engagements


"I had my first job before I was old enough to even have a learners license. So forgive me if I struggle to understand grown ass adults who are too sorry to work and expect handouts"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2018832042440737208)  2026-02-03T23:40Z 59.4K followers, [----] engagements


"So rioters you say country boys are next. You do realize country boys will sit [--] feet up a tree all day just to shoot something"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2019096165321429303)  2026-02-04T17:10Z 58.9K followers, 152.8K engagements


"A turtle is crossing the road when he's mugged by two snails. When the police show up they ask him what happened. The shaken turtle replies "I don't know. It all happened so fast.""  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2019097375302652353)  2026-02-04T17:15Z 59.4K followers, [----] engagements


"My wife is mad at me again. During an argument she yells "how the hell do yo manage to push all my buttons". I said "I was looking for . mute""  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2019098386499268935)  2026-02-04T17:19Z 59.3K followers, 14.2K engagements


"Nowadays the Pledge of Allegiance should be more like "One Nation Under Fraud Clearly Visible With Bribery and Corruption For All"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2019099105512038649)  2026-02-04T17:21Z 59.3K followers, 53K engagements


"Judge: You are sentenced to death by electric chair you have the right to a last wish Me: I want you to hold my hand"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2019100013436215643)  2026-02-04T17:25Z 59.4K followers, [----] engagements


"I was getting food and the lady in front of me in line. her order came to $6.66. She looked at the cashier and said Oh no. I don't like that total better throw in a corndog. Surely this woman is an inspiration. She's out here fighting off the powers of Satan with a corndog as her weapon of choice. https://twitter.com/i/web/status/2019100647581179915 https://twitter.com/i/web/status/2019100647581179915"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2019100647581179915)  2026-02-04T17:28Z 59.3K followers, 189.8K engagements


"Rioters hate surveillance and fascism but now they're running license plates at their own checkpoints like Temu Homeland Security. Guess defund the police" just meant replace them with untrained activists in hoodies playing authoritarian cosplay. The irony is doing backflips https://twitter.com/i/web/status/2019101827753730258 https://twitter.com/i/web/status/2019101827753730258"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2019101827753730258)  2026-02-04T17:32Z 59.1K followers, [----] engagements


"Back when I was a kid we played spin the bottle. If a girl didnt want to kiss you they had to pay you a quarter By the age of [--] I had enough money to buy a house"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2019107411215495623)  2026-02-04T17:54Z 59.2K followers, [----] engagements


"Hey Hollywood and Liberals got an answer for me Where were all the celebrities and their pins when [------] children were trafficked under the Biden Administration Oh right they were probably the ones ordering them Wolves in sheep's clothing. Don't be fooled by them"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2019109925318979608)  2026-02-04T18:04Z 59.3K followers, [----] engagements


"Even the SCOTUS is compromised They will do anything to help Democrats with their agenda WASHINGTON California can use a congressional map drawn to give Democrats an advantage in this years midterm elections the Supreme Court said Feb. [--] in a decision that will make it harder for Republicans to keep control of Congress. The court declined a request from California Republicans which was backed by the Trump administration to block the map adopted by California voters in November at the initiative of Gov. Gavin Newsom. Republicans have a razor-thin majority in the U.S. House. If Democrats seize"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2019132118660518260)  2026-02-04T19:33Z 59.1K followers, [----] engagements


"Pure fucking EVIL WHO the hell does shit like this Just goes to show how evil the left is. https://t.co/IznKKkQfXA Just goes to show how evil the left is. https://t.co/IznKKkQfXA"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2019132349309677657)  2026-02-04T19:34Z 59.1K followers, [----] engagements


"Every time I sit out on the porch. I catch myself scanning the wood line [---] feet away I guess some things never leave some of us veterans"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2019164000974524465)  2026-02-04T21:39Z 59.1K followers, 12.6K engagements


"My grandmother always objected to me cutting nails on a Thursday and I thought it was illogical But with age you realise everything has a reason. If you clip your nails on a Thurs-day. you struggle with opening beer cans on Friday Sat and Sun"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2019184162586910788)  2026-02-04T22:59Z 59.1K followers, [----] engagements


"Yall see a difference in US and them👇🏻👇🏻👇🏻"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2019211112302903753)  2026-02-05T00:46Z 59.1K followers, [----] engagements


"Let me see if Ive got this right. People in Minnesota are out in the streets all day. Protesting that ICE is trying to deport people because of day care center fraud Why if youre in the streets all day You obviously dont need daycare"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2019223015188578484)  2026-02-05T01:34Z 59.4K followers, [----] engagements


"And with this I bid you all a good night Yall be safe God Bless you and your family Every beer you drink is one beer a kid can't drink. Youre not an alcoholic youre a hero"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2019226860639396208)  2026-02-05T01:49Z 59.1K followers, [----] engagements


"Teacher: Kids tell me-what's heavier: one pound of iron or one pound of cotton Student: Iron. Teacher: What If both weigh one pound how can iron be heavier Student: No sir iron is heavier. Teacher: Look-put one pound of iron on one side of the scale and one pound of cotton on the other. Both sides will balance. Student: No sir iron is still heavier. Teacher: You idiot Both weigh the same Student: Okay sir. then you throw one pound of cotton at me and I'll throw one pound of iron at you. Then you'll understand which one is heavier"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2019450099819069743)  2026-02-05T16:36Z 59.3K followers, 256.1K engagements


"A lady golfer hits her ball into a yard that backed onto the course. As she goes to fetch it a man in the yard spots her and shouts Didn't you read my sign It says Private Property Keep Out The golfer replies "I'm very sorry Sir I didn't notice the sign. That's my ball over there. May I have it back please" The man smirks "It's in my yard so nope I think you'll find it's my ball now." The golfer pauses nods then walks back to her cart grabs another ball and throws it into the man's yard. Confused the man asks "Hey Lady whatd you do that for" She smiles and says "Well consider myself a Lady."  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2019455443676873193)  2026-02-05T16:57Z 59.1K followers, 187.6K engagements


"My wife got pulled over last night as the officer was at the window he said Mam u have the right to remain silent I leaned over from the passenger side and said yea let me know how that works out"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2019462287174647956)  2026-02-05T17:25Z 59.3K followers, 26.8K engagements


"Back in my day "Ass-licker" was 100% a school yard insult. Nowadays it's an option on most dating websites"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2019462607866913031)  2026-02-05T17:26Z 59.1K followers, 19.2K engagements


"Not trying to brag or anything but I did just finish off a puzzle in a day when on the box it said 2-4 years"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2019462950688276763)  2026-02-05T17:27Z 59.4K followers, [----] engagements


"When a man is really into you he doesn't care if you snore when you're sleeping. He's like "Snore for me you sexy diesel powered generator.""  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2019463955962356004)  2026-02-05T17:31Z 59.1K followers, [----] engagements


"If the white liberal woman had successfully ran over the ICE Agent (like she was trying to do they would all be celebrating his death Facts"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2019464258543571005)  2026-02-05T17:32Z 59.4K followers, [----] engagements


"I don't know who needs to hear this but we must all do our part to protect the planet. Like a little while ago I went to Wawa. While there I unplugged a whole row of electric cars nobody was using"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2019477238035439638)  2026-02-05T18:24Z 59.4K followers, [----] engagements


"So they can't locate illegals for deportation. But they can find them to give them money"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2019478772479643919)  2026-02-05T18:30Z 59.1K followers, [----] engagements


"Liberals boycotting ICE by skipping ice in their drinks is truly the bravest form of protest. Nothing says 'resistance' like a room-temperature Coke Revolutionary behavior"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2019516900204785709)  2026-02-05T21:02Z 59.1K followers, 20.4K engagements


"Off here today having to take the wife to the ER Prayers appreciated"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2019797054193598839)  2026-02-06T15:35Z 58.8K followers, 46.6K engagements


"Hi folks thanks for all the love shown to my wife and I with all the prayers. She is home has a blood clot in her right leg. Its a long blood clot but thankfully its in a vein and not an artery. She is still in a lot of pain. We are waiting on a blood thinner prescription to be filled. They also discovered that her knee replacement has some issues which causes her a lot of pain. Because of that age and back issues she sits most of her time. Which caused the clot. Ive talked to her about the need to fight the pain and walk some. Thanks again for all the prayers and well wishes It means a lot"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2020165292106621003)  2026-02-07T15:58Z 59.1K followers, 20.7K engagements


"MAFCA-Make America Follow the Constitution Again"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2020170072095093084)  2026-02-07T16:17Z 59.4K followers, [---] engagements


"Though I walk through the aisles of Walmart I will fear no people. Even though people are dressed weird and some women have a mustache and beard"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2020170975724101698)  2026-02-07T16:21Z 59.1K followers, [----] engagements


"Daily affirmation. it's only small if she's seen a bunch. and that's a her problem not a you problem"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2020171793508757762)  2026-02-07T16:24Z 59.4K followers, [----] engagements


"@AndreaStef8034 Shes home a clot in her right leg. Thankfully its in a vein"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2020172470850867405)  2026-02-07T16:27Z 58.5K followers, [--] engagements


"Lasked my wife if she would love me if I was fate and ugly. "Yes I do" wasn't the answer I was looking for"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2020172804931588542)  2026-02-07T16:28Z 59.4K followers, [----] engagements


"How would someone cancel an appointment at a Sperm bank Do you just call them and say you can't come"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2020173436237353259)  2026-02-07T16:30Z 59.4K followers, [----] engagements


"Let's set the record straight. Somalians didnt figure out how to scam the system. Democrat showed them how to scam the system that they set up. Meanwhile democrats sit back and get their kickbacks"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2020173816954069281)  2026-02-07T16:32Z 58.8K followers, 33.6K engagements


"Were these picture of George Bush racists too"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2020174417247007181)  2026-02-07T16:34Z 59.1K followers, [----] engagements


"Mly wife told me that dogs have their own texting codes. So I thought I'd share them with you. BOL - Bark Out Loud OMDT - Over My Dead Toy HAW - Humans Are Watching OMD - Oh My Dog TTTP - Talk To The Paw ROFB - Rolling On Floor Barking SMB- Smell My Butt"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2020176130771197955)  2026-02-07T16:41Z 59.1K followers, [----] engagements


"I love people who post whatever they want on social media. It means they've learned to choose self-expression over other people's opinions and that's beautiful"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2020176591716757565)  2026-02-07T16:43Z 59.4K followers, [----] engagements


"Hey Liberals Trump never removed his opponent from a ballot you did. Trump never used the Government against his opponent you did. Trump never censored speech; you did. Trump never stole an election you did. YOU are guilty of EVERYTHING you accused Trump of doing"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2020177250155393095)  2026-02-07T16:46Z 59.2K followers, 49.7K engagements


"A cop pulls over a woman and says "Ma'am your eyes look red. Have you been drinking" She looks him dead in the eye and says "Officer your eyes look glazed. Have you been eating donuts" The cop is furious and says "That's it Get out of the car. I'm giving you a breathalyzer." She sighs and says Officer I can't. I have asthma. If I blow into that I'll have a fatal attack. "Fine" he says "we'll take a blood sample." "Can't" she says "I'm a hemophiliac. I'll bleed to death." "Then just walk this straight a line" he barks. She smiles. "Can't do that either because I'm way too drunk.""  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2020182841288425553)  2026-02-07T17:08Z 59.2K followers, 127.2K engagements


"Good question Can you tell me WHY only [--] of these photos is offensive Aint this some shit 🍌 https://t.co/Dw9mNLrM0c Can you tell me WHY only [--] of these photos is offensive Aint this some shit 🍌 https://t.co/Dw9mNLrM0c"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2020184944207921266)  2026-02-07T17:16Z 59.4K followers, [----] engagements


"My favorite part of this isthe Lion"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2020186187927859564)  2026-02-07T17:21Z 59.1K followers, [----] engagements


"A newly married husband saved his wife's number on his mobile as "My life" After one year of marriage he changed the number to 'My Wife" After [--] years of marriage he changed the number to "Home" After [--] years of marriage he changed the number to "Hitler" After [--] years of marriage he changed the number to "Wrong Number" https://twitter.com/i/web/status/2020186839450051068 https://twitter.com/i/web/status/2020186839450051068"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2020186839450051068)  2026-02-07T17:24Z 59.4K followers, 48.5K engagements


"Listening to some Dr. Hook and the Medicine Show music Brings back some fantastic memories of teenage dance nights Days of surfing drinking beer and hanging out with my friends Lot of fond memories Unfortunately [--] of my [--] closest friends have passed on But we always pledged we would do some more awesome shit in the afterlife https://twitter.com/i/web/status/2020253083490496573 https://twitter.com/i/web/status/2020253083490496573"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2020253083490496573)  2026-02-07T21:47Z 58.7K followers, [---] engagements


"Awesome she couldve played center Michelle Obama could have joined the NBA. https://t.co/UrVLuGcKBx Michelle Obama could have joined the NBA. https://t.co/UrVLuGcKBx"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2020255271113896117)  2026-02-07T21:56Z 59.4K followers, [----] engagements


"I find it fascinating the Democrats are pissed at the picture of the Obamas as apes Hell most Democrats dont believe in God and think we evolved from apes"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2020255991720513954)  2026-02-07T21:58Z 59.4K followers, [----] engagements


"Due to the sad state of my SEX life. I'm going to convert to Muslim and change my name to Hassan Bin Laid"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2020533619035386109)  2026-02-08T16:22Z 59.3K followers, [----] engagements


"According to a news report a certain private school in Chicago IL was faced with a unique problem. A number of 12th grade girls were beginning to use lipstick and would put it on in the bathroom. That was fine but after they put on their lipstick they would press their lips to the mirror leaving dozens of little lip prints. Every night the maintenance man would remove them and the next day the girls would put them back. Finally the principal decided that something had to be done. She called all the girls to the bathroom and met them there with the maintenance man. She explained that all these"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2020534940233044447)  2026-02-08T16:27Z 59.1K followers, 10.5K engagements


"A blonde really got tired of all blonde jokes and decided to hang herself in the bathroom. As she locked the door she yelled at her husband "I'm hanging myself because I'm tired of jokes about us blondes being stupid" Her husband broke into the bathroom and saw his wife with a rope tied on her toe. The husband said I thought you were hanging yourself. She said "Yes I am" The husband replied "Usually when people hang themselves they tie the rope around their neck so why is yours tied on your toe" She said I tried that but I couldn't breathe https://twitter.com/i/web/status/2020536683289002202"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2020536683289002202)  2026-02-08T16:34Z 59.1K followers, 84.6K engagements


"I was washing my car and my liberal neighbor asked "You washing your car" I said "No I'm watering it to see if it will grow into a bus.""  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2020541228333306036)  2026-02-08T16:52Z 59.4K followers, [----] engagements


"Still hilariously funny Anyone still find this hilarious 😆 https://t.co/086apudgr6 Anyone still find this hilarious 😆 https://t.co/086apudgr6"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2020595555718897962)  2026-02-08T20:28Z 59.4K followers, [----] engagements


"Im so glad during the [--] years I spent coaching kids I never had a girl or boy think they were another gender They never stayed seated during the playing of the National Anthem They always stood proud with their hand over their hearts When I run into one of them these days First thing I notice they are still very respectful of me. Even the ones that spent a lot of time on the bench. I never turned a kid away rich poor bad athlete or good athlete Had a few that didnt have a father in their life I tried as best I could to fill that role on the field So many outstanding women and men today Some"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2020598981265699254)  2026-02-08T20:41Z 59.4K followers, [----] engagements


"No man in this entire country is more racist than Michelle Obama"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2020609219612057847)  2026-02-08T21:22Z 59.1K followers, 28.1K engagements


"I wonder if the China Virus was still as active as it was when it came out. Would Democrats be wearing masks and staying [--] feet away from ICE officers"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2020610616528863418)  2026-02-08T21:28Z 58.8K followers, [----] engagements


"Democrats constantly claim that their voters are more educated than Republican Voters. Democrats also claim their voters are too stupid to obtain a voter ID. So which is it Are they scholarly or stone cold stupid"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2020656358601924643)  2026-02-09T00:29Z 59.1K followers, [----] engagements


"The TP USA show was awesome Especially the end of it honoring Charlie Kirk We Are Charlie Kirk"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2020675748894330983)  2026-02-09T01:46Z 58.9K followers, [----] engagements


"Mary had a little lamb she kept it fat and plastered and when the price of pork went up she shot the little Bastard"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2020879599735914831)  2026-02-09T15:16Z 59K followers, [----] engagements


"Condom wrappers nowadays are too hard to open. These producers are trying to give the ladies enough time to change their mind"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2020882333876781527)  2026-02-09T15:27Z 59.1K followers, [----] engagements


"I was once told by my grandpa. When your hand itches youre going to get something When your crotch itches it means you already have something"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2020884602923929786)  2026-02-09T15:36Z 59.1K followers, [----] engagements


"Female frogs fake their own death to avoid mating with unattractive males. Like "ughh here comes Todd play dead girl""  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2020885303473459410)  2026-02-09T15:39Z 59.1K followers, [----] engagements


"Lets see if I have this correct. If youre white you're on "stolen land" even after [---] years But if you're Somali Haitian Nigerian Indian Venezuelan etc you're "American" the day you arrive in the USA l Make it make sense"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2020886660309774698)  2026-02-09T15:45Z 59.1K followers, 26.2K engagements


"3 reasons not to fight an old man. If you win you beat up an old man. If you lose you got beat up by an old man. More than likely an old man will shoot you"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2020894162174763510)  2026-02-09T16:14Z 59.3K followers, 27.9K engagements


"Kids these days: Shut up mom" Mom: shuts up Me back in the day: "Shut up mom" Me. "Wh-where am I" Doctor-The ER. It took us six hoursito get this shoe out of your ass"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2020895874021253181)  2026-02-09T16:21Z 59.1K followers, 11.7K engagements


"Big Mike is being urged to file a defamation lawsuit against suit against those call him a male Welp do itlets see if you really are a man or woman"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2020941762739704214)  2026-02-09T19:23Z 59K followers, [----] engagements


"@WashRick I follow Jackie and Shadow as well They are so cool"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2020943687606522108)  2026-02-09T19:31Z 59K followers, [----] engagements


"The Pens Poem My nookie days are over my pilot light is out. What used to be my sex appeal is now my water spout Time was when on its own from my trousers it would spring. But now its just a full time job to find the fucking thing It used to be embarrassing the way it would behave because every single morning it would stand and watch me shave Now as old age approaches It sure gives me the blues to see it hang its little head and watch me tie my shoes"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2020959917423644770)  2026-02-09T20:36Z 59.1K followers, [----] engagements


"Taken from a post on FB. But I noticed the name change at the start of his second song. My wife asked me is that Kid Rock I replied yes it is. Hes using his real name I think Awesome message in the last verse of that song If you watched the Kid Rock show last night did you notice the symbolism of the journey of his music and life. He was introduced as Kid Rock and bound on to the stage with his first big hit Bawidaba full of raunchy lyrics and everything Kid Rock personifies then the curtain closed and there was the cellist and violinist alone playing very beautiful actually soul touching"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2020976276152913942)  2026-02-09T21:41Z 59.1K followers, 25K engagements


"Yall will have to forgive me for this but If you're too stupid to figure out how to get a photo ID you probably shouldn't be voting anyway"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2020986629771624721)  2026-02-09T22:22Z 59.2K followers, 15.9K engagements


"Hey @NFL next year try to act like you have players from the USA too Be American and stop with your WOKE bullshit Thanks from every American that has fought or died for this Country Your bullshit is no longer acceptable"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2020990830043947111)  2026-02-09T22:38Z 59K followers, [----] engagements


"@RobertaFresque2 Honda [--] cub 1964"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2020998238682202286)  2026-02-09T23:08Z 59K followers, [---] engagements


"Hey @NFL the only Bunnies Ive ever cared about in my [--] years. Were Bugs Bunny and Playboy Bunnies"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2021032958506008667)  2026-02-10T01:26Z 59.1K followers, [----] engagements


"Im giving away a battery No charge"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2021274232043212882)  2026-02-10T17:25Z 59.1K followers, [----] engagements


"Hey golfers have you ever hit a ball so far left. It dyed its hair blue and started protesting"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2021274634969092366)  2026-02-10T17:26Z 59.1K followers, [----] engagements


"Did you know the true meaning of the doggy position Its when the husband sits up and begs"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2021276015436112343)  2026-02-10T17:32Z 59.1K followers, [---] engagements


"What do you call a gay bar with no barstools A fruit stand"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2021276660444590344)  2026-02-10T17:34Z 59.1K followers, [----] engagements


"At Walmart today a woman cut in front of me at the grocery store. She had a bottle of wine a box of tampons and some ibuprofen. I didn't say a word; I just let her go first. No reason to die today"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2021287446692893095)  2026-02-10T18:17Z 59.1K followers, 81K engagements


"@PeriklesGREAT Go home sleep in your bed there Problem solved"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2021289628104523857)  2026-02-10T18:26Z 59.1K followers, [----] engagements


"After you die are you worried when you see your mom again. Will she know all the dumb shit you did"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2021290829755940980)  2026-02-10T18:31Z 59.4K followers, [----] engagements


"This is how Miss Baylee sleeps with us at night Between the wife and I"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2021298800527118502)  2026-02-10T19:02Z 59.3K followers, [----] engagements


"Anyone heard any new news about the staged attack on Ilhan Omar It kinda sorta just seemed to disappear"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2021307739243266436)  2026-02-10T19:38Z 59.3K followers, 10.8K engagements


"Wrap your head around this. The Democrats are mad ICE is using Medicaid data to arrest illegals After they told us illegals aren't on medicaid"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2021311494084759671)  2026-02-10T19:53Z 59.3K followers, 37.6K engagements


"What do you call a Chinese man with a camera Fil Ming"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2021319302784143441)  2026-02-10T20:24Z 59.4K followers, [----] engagements


"My daughters shi t zu passed away this afternoon. He and the kids are absolutely devastated. Elsa was [--] years old weighed [--] lbs. She would sit in my lap when we went to Atlanta. Got to find a way to get them another puppy for our daughters birthday in March"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2021390913843626155)  2026-02-11T01:08Z 59.3K followers, 12.2K engagements


"I just read there is a man with severe diarrhea in Japan Liberals are blaming it on Trump"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2021402536910127196)  2026-02-11T01:54Z 59.3K followers, [----] engagements


"An aged farmer and his wife were leaning against the edge of their pig-pen when the old woman wistfully recalled that the next week would mark their golden wedding anniversary. Let's have a party Homer she suggested. Let's kill a pig. The farmer scratched his grizzled head. "Gee Ethel" he finally answered I don't see why the dang pig should take the blame for something that happened fifty years ago. https://twitter.com/i/web/status/2021628718104342604 https://twitter.com/i/web/status/2021628718104342604"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2021628718104342604)  2026-02-11T16:53Z 59.3K followers, [----] engagements


"Valentine's Special $500. Me and my friend arrest you in front of your wife and release you on Sunday the 15th. Includes camping fee fishing license tent and beer. We come in full police uniform and blue lights"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2021630190665830648)  2026-02-11T16:59Z 59.3K followers, [----] engagements


"A guy goes into a costume shop. He says"I'm going to acostume party I want to go as Adam"' The girl brings out a fig leaf. He says "Not big enough" She brings out a bigger one. He says"'Still not big enough. She brings out a huge fig leaf. He says"Still not big enough." She says Listen Ace why don't you just throw it over your shoulder and go as a gasoline pump"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2021648719184376087)  2026-02-11T18:13Z 59.3K followers, 17.1K engagements


"@gman5180 @TrumpyKatt Whatever that bitch is for Im against"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2021704049993699453)  2026-02-11T21:53Z 59.1K followers, [---] engagements


"@PecanC8 Work in a gay bar"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2021704224451568092)  2026-02-11T21:53Z 59.3K followers, [---] engagements


"@its_The_Dr Move forward"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2021704353300508727)  2026-02-11T21:54Z 59.2K followers, [---] engagements


"Folks some of you have been skeptical about the products @forgedbyad makes and sells I got these [--] from him today Im honestly thrilled with all [--] of the knives Especially the large one It is absolutely beautiful and very sharp. I bought it for my nephew but I like it so much Im going to keep it for myself If you like well made awesome looking knives check his shop out Hes always been [---] % honest with me. Ive never seen any bad reviews about his products in his store Thank you @forgedbyad I absolutely appreciate you your friendship and knives"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2022004354727735334)  2026-02-12T17:46Z 59.2K followers, [----] engagements


"@KING_V1 Thanks"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2022404258356998377)  2026-02-13T20:15Z 59.3K followers, [--] engagements


"@MAstronomers Fake as shit"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2018432754002649420)  2026-02-02T21:14Z 59.6K followers, [----] engagements


"My wife went to the doctor and says: " Doctor my Husband constantly talks in his sleep. What can I do about it" Doctor replies "Give him a chance to speak in the daytime.""  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2019095681483342117)  2026-02-04T17:08Z 59.5K followers, 27.8K engagements


"A kid can pee in a bed my wife can pee in her pants when she sneezes but I get in trouble if I pee on the toilet seat.At least I made it in the toilet"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2019461089751151058)  2026-02-05T17:20Z 59.5K followers, 34.5K engagements


"Don't forget this month we celebrate the three day's when the man is always right. That would be 29th 30th and 31st February"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2019480593067643107)  2026-02-05T18:37Z 59.7K followers, [----] engagements


"Pay attention kids. As soon as the truth came out about Refee Good. They moved on to the five year old boy when that truth came out they moved on to Alex Pretti. When that truth came out they've come up with a fake attack on Omar"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2020175712557392262)  2026-02-07T16:39Z 59.6K followers, [----] engagements


"A guy walks into a bar looking miserable. The bartender asks "What's wrong man You look like your dog just ran off with your wife." The guy sighs. "Worse. My wife ran off with my dog" The bartender pours him a drink. "That's rough. How long were you married" "Twelve years" the guy says. "And the dog Only six months. But here's the kicker-I'm not even mad about the wife leaving." The bartender raises an eyebrow. "You're not" "Nah the guy replies. "The dog was house-trained paid half the rent in cuddles never complained about my cooking and never once asked me 'Do these jeans make my tail look"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2020181099171680375)  2026-02-07T17:01Z 59.5K followers, 36.8K engagements


"The fourth-grade teacher had to leave the room for a few minutes. When she returned she found the children in perfect order. Everybody was sitting absolutely quiet. She was shocked and stunned and said "I've never seen anything like this before This is wonderful. But please tell me what came over all of you Why are you so quiet and well behaved Finally after much urging little Sally spoke up and said "Well one time you said that if you ever came back and found us quiet you would drop dead." https://twitter.com/i/web/status/2020181893476470941"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2020181893476470941)  2026-02-07T17:04Z 59.6K followers, 29.6K engagements


"So it's the first day of college. The Dean of Women is finishing up her speech to the female freshman. In conclusion ladies if you get pregnant you'll likely have to drop out and miss out on many of your dreams. Think about it Is that one hour of pleasure worth a lifetime of commitment. Now" the Dean says "Are there any questions" "Yeah" says a voice from the back "How do you make them last an hour" https://twitter.com/i/web/status/2020183734335443249 https://twitter.com/i/web/status/2020183734335443249"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2020183734335443249)  2026-02-07T17:11Z 59.5K followers, 10.2K engagements


"Listening to some Dr. Hook and the Medicine Show music Cover of the Rolling Stone sing it with me Then we can do Silvias Mother Next up When Youre in love with a beautiful woman Brings back some fantastic memories of teenage dance nights Days of surfing drinking beer and hanging out with my friends Lot of fond memories Unfortunately [--] of my [--] closest friends have passed on But we always pledged we would do some more awesome shit in the afterlife https://twitter.com/i/web/status/2020254529334440103 https://twitter.com/i/web/status/2020254529334440103"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2020254529334440103)  2026-02-07T21:53Z 59.5K followers, [----] engagements


"Little Johnny staying with his grandma for a few days. After playing outside with the neighborhood kids he ran and asked: "Grandma what is it called when [--] people sleep in the same room and one is on top of the others" Grandma caught off guard but wanting to be honest said. Well that's called sexual intercourse darling. Johnny nodded "Oh okay" A few minutes later he stormed back and said Grandma it's not called sexual intercourse.Its called BUNK BEDS Jimmys mom wants to talk to you https://twitter.com/i/web/status/2020537843190276315 https://twitter.com/i/web/status/2020537843190276315"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2020537843190276315)  2026-02-08T16:38Z 59.6K followers, 32.7K engagements


"A turkey chatting with a bull "I would love to be able to get to the top of that tree" sighed the turkey "but I haven't got the energy." "Well why don't you nibble on some of my droppings" replied the bull. "They're packed with nutrients." The turkey pecked at a lump of dung and found it actually gave him enough strength to reach the lowest branch of the tree. The next day after eating some more dung he reached the second branch. Finally after a fourth day the turkey was proudly perched at the top of the tree. He was promptly spotted by a farmer who shot him out of the tree. Moral of the"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2020544597739323901)  2026-02-08T17:05Z 59.5K followers, 22.3K engagements


"Ive been a sports fan all my life But with all the bullshit half time shows. Going to the Olympics to trash the country you live in. Kneeling on the sideline Political commercial trashing this country and its President Im becoming less of a fan Just play your game get paid millions of dollars and.shut the fuck up https://twitter.com/i/web/status/2020550085222727696 https://twitter.com/i/web/status/2020550085222727696"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2020550085222727696)  2026-02-08T17:27Z 59.7K followers, [----] engagements


"Just put that I'm a woman on my car insurance and saved $400. This pick your gender crap is brilliant"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2020880027529732585)  2026-02-09T15:18Z 59.6K followers, 35.7K engagements


"John credits "The View" with saving his life. After John had been in a coma for almost three months. A nurse came in and turned his hospital tv to "The View." John got up and changed the channel"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2020882760328470986)  2026-02-09T15:29Z 59.6K followers, [----] engagements


"A rabbit and the carrot were lifelong friends. They were walking along one day and a car jumped the curb and ran down the carrot. An ambulance took the carrot to the hospital where he was rushed into surgery. The rabbit paced the waiting room for hours. Eventually the doctor came out and said "Mr Rabbit l've got good news and bad news about your friend." "What's the good news" "He survived the surgery." "And the bad news" "He's going to be a vegetable for the rest of his life." https://twitter.com/i/web/status/2020888476183322832 https://twitter.com/i/web/status/2020888476183322832"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2020888476183322832)  2026-02-09T15:52Z 59.5K followers, [----] engagements


"A man appears before a judge one day asking for a divorce. The judge quietly reviews some papers and then says "Please tell me why you are seeking a divorce" "Because" the man says "I live in a two-story house." The judge replies "What kind of a reason if that What is the big deal about a two-story house" The man answers "Well judge one story is I have a headache" and the other story is "It's that time of the month https://twitter.com/i/web/status/2020890135626179010 https://twitter.com/i/web/status/2020890135626179010"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2020890135626179010)  2026-02-09T15:58Z 59.5K followers, 31.8K engagements


"During the wedding rehearsal the groom approached the pastor with an unusual offer. "Look l'll give you $100 if you'll change the wedding vows. When you get to the part where I'm supposed to promise to 'love honor and obey' and be faithful to her forever l'd appreciate it if you'd just leave that out." He passed the minister a $100 bill and walked away satisfied. On the day of the wedding when it came time for the groom's vows the pastor looked the young man in the eye and said Will you promise to prostrate yourself before her obey her every command and wish serve her breakfast in bed every"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2020890957441388611)  2026-02-09T16:02Z 59.6K followers, 98.4K engagements


"A man went into the proctologist's office for his first exam. The doctor told him to have a seat in the examination room and that he would be with him in just a few minutes. Well when the man sat down in the examination room he noticed that there were three items on a stand next to the doctor's desk: a tube of K-Y jelly a rubber glove and a beer. When the doctor came in the man said "Look Doc this is my first exam. I know what the K-Y is for. and I know what the glove is for. but what's the BEER for" The doctor became noticeably outraged and stormed over to the door. The doc flung the door"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2021269431804944699)  2026-02-10T17:06Z 59.7K followers, 16.4K engagements


"A construction worker goes to the doctor and complains about wana being constipated. The doctor examines him and asks about his life work the usual. Then he examines the body parts in question and says bend over and brace yourself. The worker slightly confused does as he is told. So the doctor grabs a board and smacks the worker hard on the ass. After worker collects himself doctor tells him to use the bathroom and come back and report on his condition. The worker does it and comes back elated. "I don't know what you did but it worked. What should I do to prevent this from happening" Oh"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2021272407982395616)  2026-02-10T17:17Z 59.6K followers, 15.5K engagements


"The Wizard of Oz was the start of people with no brain talking Liberals have continued that tradition"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2021288237956784467)  2026-02-10T18:20Z 59.6K followers, [----] engagements


"There are a lot of unanswered questions Why do they keep going back to the house Everything shouldve been looked into before they left the first time https://t.co/MqGeRBiEAF Why didnt the FBI publish this earlier Someone might have recognized the clothing-gait etc @POdPatriot @lastpowerranger @Dawn58760230976 @BlondeMAGAinNJ @Arkypatriot @BamaSaltyMarine https://t.co/MqGeRBiEAF Why didnt the FBI publish this earlier Someone might have recognized the clothing-gait etc @POdPatriot @lastpowerranger @Dawn58760230976 @BlondeMAGAinNJ @Arkypatriot @BamaSaltyMarine"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2021320582034284638)  2026-02-10T20:29Z 59.6K followers, [----] engagements


"A Sunday school teacher asked her class. What was Jesus mother's name One child answered Mary The teacher then asked who knows what Jesus father's name was A little kid saidVerge Confused the teacher asked Where did you get that from The kid said Well you know they are always talking about Verge n Mary https://twitter.com/i/web/status/2021622088289653072 https://twitter.com/i/web/status/2021622088289653072"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2021622088289653072)  2026-02-11T16:27Z 59.6K followers, 18.1K engagements


"A guy falls asleep on the beach for several hours and ends up with a terrible sunburn all over his body. He goes to the hospital and is quickly admitted after being diagnosed with second-degree burns on his legs. By the time the doctor arrives he 's blistering and in serious pain. To help him the doctor orders an IV with saline and electrolvtes a sedative and a Viagra pill every four hours. The attending nurse looks surprised and asks what good will Viagra do for him The doctor replies It'll keep the sheets off his legs"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2021624510546362465)  2026-02-11T16:36Z 59.6K followers, 52.8K engagements


"Roses are vans Violets are Tractors. This poem makes no sense. Sausages"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2021683259445273073)  2026-02-11T20:30Z 59.5K followers, [----] engagements


"I feel sorry for the Guthrie family and Nancy Guthrie. But I wish folks spent as much time talking about and trying to find all the missing kids I guess if you dont have a lot of money or arent a celebrity it just doesnt matter as much And thats where this country went to hell https://twitter.com/i/web/status/2021726591328387192 https://twitter.com/i/web/status/2021726591328387192"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2021726591328387192)  2026-02-11T23:22Z 59.7K followers, [----] engagements


"@lady_valor_07 1971"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2022036728283115762)  2026-02-12T19:54Z 59.5K followers, [---] engagements


"A guy gets pulled over for speeding and the officer said What's your name son He replied "D-d d-dav-dav. david sir." The Officer looked at him suspiciously and said Oh do you have a stutter The guy replied "No sir my ' dad has a stutter and the guy who filled out my birth certificate is an asshole." https://twitter.com/i/web/status/1946592693666148615 https://twitter.com/i/web/status/1946592693666148615"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/1946592693666148615)  2025-07-19T15:27Z 59.8K followers, 68.8K engagements


"We the American people are to blame for the shit going on today Ill be the first to admit it We sat back and trusted our government to carry on the values that this country has always stood for and believed in As we worked our wives worked to provide for our family and our childrens future. The government became infiltrated by people from other countries. It became corrupt from the top down Our tax dollars were being secretly sent to countries that want to destroy OUR country Destroy OUR freedoms Freedoms that our forefathers and family members fought for many giving their life for those"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2018380921347395799)  2026-02-02T17:48Z 59.8K followers, 71.8K engagements


"Let's have illegal immigrants hunt down sex offenders for a chance at citizenship. We'll call it Alien vs. Predator"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2019460447477379390)  2026-02-05T17:17Z 59.8K followers, 934.6K engagements


"I called Southwest Airlines to book a fight. The flight operator asks So How many people are flying with you sir. I replied "How the He would I know lady its your FUCKN plane""  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2020542556283564264)  2026-02-08T16:57Z 59.8K followers, [----] engagements


"Three ducks go into a bar: "Say what's your name" the bartender asked the first duck. "Huey." was the reply. "How's your day been Huey "Great. Lovely day. Had a ball. Been in and out of puddles all day. What else could a duck want" said Huey "Oh that's nice" said the bartender. He turned to the second duck "Hi and what's your name" "Dewey." came the answer from duck number two. "So how's your day been Dewey" he asked. "Great. Lovely day. I've had a ball too. Been in and out of puddles all day myself. What else could a duck want" The bartender turned to the third duck and said "So you must be"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2021266792639873357)  2026-02-10T16:55Z 59.8K followers, 69.4K engagements


"Please pray for my wife She got stung by a bee in the forehead. She's in Hospital now her face all swollen and bruised she almost died. Luckily I was close enough to hit the bee with my shovel"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2021622668500603115)  2026-02-11T16:29Z 59.8K followers, 140.8K engagements


"Little Tommy was sitting in class bored as usual. The teacher decided that since it was Friday afternoon and there was nothing left to do for the week she'd let the students go home early if they could answer a question correctly. Teacher: "Okay class which president said: 'The only thing we have to fear is fear itself'" Little Tommy was bouncing up and down in his seat arm raised: " I KNOW" Before the teacher could call on him little Julie stood and said: "Franklin Roosevelt". "Very good Julie you can go now." the teacher replied. "Okay class which president said: 'Ask not what your country"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2022370147538006190)  2026-02-13T17:59Z 59.8K followers, 39.3K engagements


"I was helping my neighbors daughter with her homework the other night. She was having a hard time understanding the difference between the words new and knew. So I said Okay here's an example.That woman that your daddy left you all for wasn't NEW your momma just never KNEW. https://twitter.com/i/web/status/2022387803519107272 https://twitter.com/i/web/status/2022387803519107272"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2022387803519107272)  2026-02-13T19:10Z 59.8K followers, [----] engagements


"77 years ago today a [--] year old Mother gave birth to me She was the strongest Lady Ive ever known"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2022699181417058375)  2026-02-14T15:47Z 59.8K followers, 48.4K engagements


"My lesbian neighbors asked me to help them conceive a child recently. They said "they don't mind if we did it the old fashioned way" as the are pretty easy going. Past [--] months now we have been trying but I just dont have the heart to tell them I had a vasectomy last year"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2022722152881967478)  2026-02-14T17:18Z 59.8K followers, 4M engagements


"I want to thank everyone for the wonderful happy birthday wishes There were so many I couldnt answer each one individually Im so thankful that Ive lived long enough to meet some awesome people on here It has meant a great deal to me to share jokes and things to make you smile a bit. Especially in todays crazy world Again from the bottom of my heart ♥THANK EACH OF YOU Happy ValentinesDay to you and yours ❤❤❤❤ https://twitter.com/i/web/status/2022823142528262349 https://twitter.com/i/web/status/2022823142528262349"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2022823142528262349)  2026-02-14T23:59Z 59.8K followers, [----] engagements


"Yesterday I was in the checkout line with a giant 50-pound bag of Purina dog chow for Baylee my dog. The woman behind me looked at the bag then at me and asked Oh Do you have a dog (What did she think I had an elephant) Since Im retired and have way too much free time I decided to have a little fun. I told her dead serious No I dont have a dog. Im going back on the Purina Diet. Her eyes widened so I continued Last time I tried it I lost [--] pounds before I landed in intensive care tubes everywhere IVs in both arms. But hey it works The diets simple: fill your pockets with Purina nuggets and"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2023076798372716731)  2026-02-15T16:47Z 59.8K followers, [----] engagements


"I'm in the ER I don't want to bore you with details but the Dyson Ball Cleaner is a dangerously misleading product name"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/1960708582758048167)  2025-08-27T14:18Z 59.7K followers, 46.6K engagements


"Back in my day the only time we started panic buying was when the bartender yelled last call"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2019458125594583156)  2026-02-05T17:08Z 59.8K followers, 11.9K engagements


"Hey Liberals I have an honest question for you. If we keep selling off farm land to put wind Mills and solar panels on it. Where the hell do you think the food you eat is going to come from If its from a foreign country what will you do if they slowly poison you to death No matter what youve been told or believe not every leader in another country loves you Ive seen wood rats sold as food they eat dogs Careful what you listen to and believe Travel to a socialist country and hang out with the peasants. Before its too late for you https://twitter.com/i/web/status/2020258825421615518"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2020258825421615518)  2026-02-07T22:10Z 59.8K followers, [----] engagements


"A Korean and a Jew. Jew: Hey. weren't you people responsible for Pearl Harbor Korean: Uh. that was the Japanese. I'm Korean. Jew: Pffftt Japanese Chinese Korean. What's the difference Korean: Well wait weren't you people responsible for sinking the Titanic Jew: Uh. that was an iceberg. Korean: Pffftt Rosenberg Goldberg iceberg. What's the difference https://twitter.com/i/web/status/2020541897928810858 https://twitter.com/i/web/status/2020541897928810858"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2020541897928810858)  2026-02-08T16:55Z 59.8K followers, 1.7M engagements


"I went to the doctors a few weeks ago for a little bit of shoulder pain Once I got my prescription filled and took the medication I began to feel really bad I read the Side Effects and it stated: May cause Diarrhea and Dizziness. May also cause Cold Sweats Irregular Heart Beat and Swelling in the Throat If this persists consult your physician. If you experience Seizures or Shortness of breath stop taking the medication and dial [---] immediately OMG The medicine is worse than my shoulder pain https://twitter.com/i/web/status/2020543385409331589"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2020543385409331589)  2026-02-08T17:00Z 59.8K followers, 23.6K engagements


"The Eagle in the Budweiser commercial last night. Is a rescued Eagle [--] years old named Lincoln Was trained to fly directly over the horse"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2020898792527028359)  2026-02-09T16:33Z 59.8K followers, 134K engagements


"A teenage boy came downstairs ready for a summer bonfire party wearing skin-tight ripped jeans that left very little to the imagination. His grandpa took one look from his recliner and grumbled "Son in my day we left something for the wedding night." The teen just smirked. "Relax Pops. It's a free world. Gotta let the package breathe" And out he strutted. The next morning the teen walked into the kitchen for cereal. There sat Grandpa at the table sipping coffee. wearing nothing but an unbuttoned Hawaiian shirt completely bare from the waist down. The teen nearly choked. "Grandpa What are you"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2021268659927142644)  2026-02-10T17:02Z 59.8K followers, 45.3K engagements


"I saw this guy missing his left hand and was wearing a nice Rolex on his left wrist. I asked him why don't you wear your watch on ya right wrist so it won't possibly fall off. The guy looked at me and said how am I gonna put it on"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2021270982808248517)  2026-02-10T17:12Z 59.8K followers, 1.1M engagements


"What do you get if you eat a meal of baked beans and peanut butter A fart that sticks to the roof of your ass"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2021272998884327866)  2026-02-10T17:20Z 59.8K followers, [----] engagements


""Poem of the Day" If the ocean was made of Bourbon and I was a duck. I would swim to the bottom and never come up. But since the ocean isn't Bourbon and I'm not a duck. Just hand me the bottle and shut the fuck up"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2021620952308871512)  2026-02-11T16:22Z 59.8K followers, 11.4K engagements


"A husband tried to get lucky. Wife said "Not tonight. Sometimes a woman just wants to be held." Cool. He held her all night. Next day at the mall he says Pick whatever you want. She grabs clothes shoes and diamond earrings. "Ready for you to pay" she says. He smiles Pay Nah. I just wanted you to hold it. Guess we're even now. https://twitter.com/i/web/status/2021629460944912600 https://twitter.com/i/web/status/2021629460944912600"  
[X Link](https://x.com/BamaSaltyMarine/status/2021629460944912600)  2026-02-11T16:56Z 59.8K followers, 948.5K engagements

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