@HeidiPriebe1 Avatar @HeidiPriebe1 Heidi Priebe 🏔️❄️

Heidi Priebe 🏔️❄️ posts on X about see the, toronto, saving, has been the most. They currently have [------] followers and [---] posts still getting attention that total [-------] engagements in the last [--] hours.

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Social Influence

Social category influence technology brands 6% travel destinations 3% finance 3% social networks 2% stocks 1% countries 1%

Social topic influence see the 3%, toronto 3%, saving 2%, has been 2%, longterm 2%, realm 2%, future 2%, feels 1%, slow 1%, return 1%

Top accounts mentioned or mentioned by @jessehammackx @baoteching @milanmeck @nopranablem @jamesclear @bertiewilby @linasgabrie @nihilitatis_rex @chicmain @sloughcreek09 @pranavsm @olga100104 @kingbowser86 @authordanm

Top assets mentioned fuckcoin (FUCKCOIN) Alphabet Inc Class A (GOOGL)

Top Social Posts

Top posts by engagements in the last [--] hours

"Its amazing how many times Ive thought Ive had some big problem until I finally crack & talk to someone about it & then everything feels different & it turns out to be yet another instance of the real problem being that I think I cant have connection until I have no problems"
X Link 2026-01-28T08:22Z 23.8K followers, 25.4K engagements

"Slow is smooth smooth is fast Slow is smooth smooth is fast Slow is smooth smooth is fast Slow is smooth smooth is fast Slow is smooth smooth is fast Slow is smooth smooth is fast Slow is smooth smooth is fast Slow is smooth smooth is fast Slow is smooth smooth is fast"
X Link 2026-01-28T18:31Z 23.8K followers, [----] engagements

"Feeling like this might be the mantra for the whole middle portion of my life"
X Link 2026-01-28T18:32Z 23.8K followers, [----] engagements

"Repair is not contrary to what many think about the allocation of blame. It is about the capacity for a return to intimacy. When we have hurt someone we have changed them. To refuse to see the part of them that has been changed by us is to no longer know them"
X Link 2026-01-29T18:58Z 23.8K followers, 75.2K engagements

"I once had a very long relationship with someone who was unfaithful [--] years in. We were together for [--] years but only really knew each other for [--]. He didnt want to know the version of me that had been hurt by him and in fairness neither did I. I pathologized my hurt as too big too dramatic too unreasonable relative to the circumstances. But the hurt went on being a part of me. I couldnt know myself holistically again until many many years later when I finally accepted the experience as something that had shaped me"
X Link 2026-01-29T19:21Z 23.8K followers, [----] engagements

"This has been one of the saddest but most pervasively true lessons I have learned in life. Someone who is unwilling to know us in our hurt is no longer able to know us. There can be no intimacy past that point only nostalgia for the intimacy existed before. Love can survive hurt - and strengthen from it - but it cannot survive the othering of it"
X Link 2026-01-29T19:28Z 23.8K followers, 13.1K engagements

"Yes. We can control our expressions of emotion (which tends to compound and/or warp them) but the only way to actually move them is to get congruent about them. My therapist told me the only way to control your emotions is to show them. You can't control sadness you never show. Then your sadness turns to anger hostility bitterness and resentment. And you have officially created a monster. My therapist told me the only way to control your emotions is to show them. You can't control sadness you never show. Then your sadness turns to anger hostility bitterness and resentment. And you have"
X Link 2026-02-08T19:47Z 23.8K followers, 12.5K engagements

"I sort of fucking hate how human and embodied and present heartbreak makes you feel. Like why is this the button that makes everything else this much more vivid. Why not I don't know anything else"
X Link 2026-02-15T17:49Z 23.8K followers, 12.1K engagements

"Literally nobody listen to me for the next few months but: every city should have a designated clubhouse for heartbroken (& otherwise actively sad) people where you can go be in public but without anyone expecting you to be normal. Like a place where you can go order a latte break open your laptop & then just sob quietly to yourself for three hours. And nobody is uncomfortable about it & in fact new friendships get forged between people who suddenly have a lot of spare time on their hands. Anyway I think that this would fix society"
X Link 2026-02-15T19:16Z 23.8K followers, 62.8K engagements

"Just in a heartbreak-story mood so had something similar many years ago. An ex & I agreed to do a long period without contact post-breakup. I missed them a lot during the time & reached out the day our agreed-upon no-contact period ended. They were already with someone else and didn't want to get back in touch. Spent another [--] months processing that blow. [--] years later we got back in touch again as friends. While talking about the period after we broke up they apologized for how many times they called during the no-contact period and how embarrassed they were about it. Except I had never"
X Link 2026-02-15T22:08Z 23.8K followers, 237.7K engagements

"First unreasonable act of the year is taking the entirety of January off and tending only to my depression which has been mounting throughout [----]. Ive been walking 2-3 hrs/day & writing 3-4 hrs/day (both voluntarily) and it feels like starting the year on a giant exhale. Ive decided my word of the year for [----] is unreasonable. Ive decided my word of the year for [----] is unreasonable"
X Link 2025-01-06T22:04Z 21.7K followers, 22.6K engagements

"I went to an event the night before I posted this where I asked people to gaslight me into thinking winter in Toronto is awesome and I got a bunch of advice on how to love it & have been implementing it all & it is still working remarkably well. This year I have decided to simply love winter (a season Ive historically abhorred) and its working remarkably well. This year I have decided to simply love winter (a season Ive historically abhorred) and its working remarkably well"
X Link 2025-01-11T18:52Z 21.7K followers, 16K engagements

"What Im surfacing this year is that I have legit learned helplessness around winter. I grew up in a town where it was regularly [---] to [---] degrees Celsius in winter & nothing helped with the cold. Didnt matter how you dressed etc. Im marveling now that winter can be enjoyed"
X Link 2025-01-11T19:24Z 21.7K followers, [----] engagements

"The whole fuck around/find out thing has a divine order embedded in it"
X Link 2025-01-17T16:44Z 21.6K followers, [----] engagements

"I always thought that being a good partner was synonymous to keeping my needs to a minimum. But something I realized through dating other avoidants is that in order to fall in love I need to feel deeply useful to someone - like they are open to me having a profound impact on them and vice versa"
X Link 2025-02-26T06:07Z 21.8K followers, 30.8K engagements

"Just got back from staying at a hotel that had such obscenely good lighting I could barely enjoy my stay. Just felt guilty for not filming any YT videos the whole time"
X Link 2025-02-27T07:53Z 23K followers, [----] engagements

"There was a year of my life where my favorite icebreaker question was 'What's your favorite thing' - a question many struggled to answer - but I once posed it to a photographer who looked me dead in the eyes and w [--] hesitation replied 'Good lighting.' [--] yrs later I understand"
X Link 2025-02-27T07:56Z 23K followers, [----] engagements

"Healing is not meant to leave us in a spot where the only skill in our arsenal is unpacking & analyzing our emotions. The idea is to develop that skill in service of becoming more flexible courageous and capable of adapting to the lives we actually want"
X Link 2025-03-02T17:44Z 23K followers, [----] engagements

"Yess I remember when I updated my partner/relationship ideal from minimal conflict relationship to relationship where we both appreciate & want to learn as much as possible from conflict. 10/10 update. Sure love is supposed to be work. But have you considered that work is supposed to be fun Sure love is supposed to be work. But have you considered that work is supposed to be fun"
X Link 2025-03-08T20:44Z 23.4K followers, 18.5K engagements

"@baoteching It feels sort of like clearing a road that I can now run down freely Does the stress for you come from now having to complete the tasks you set out or something else"
X Link 2025-04-07T13:20Z 21.8K followers, [---] engagements

"Okay but completely unironically this is what I think almost every time I hear people talk about biohacking/longevity. someone should tell the people desperate to extend their lifespans that you can do this by increasing the meaning-density of your days and the breadth of experience you're noticing someone should tell the people desperate to extend their lifespans that you can do this by increasing the meaning-density of your days and the breadth of experience you're noticing"
X Link 2025-04-13T11:40Z 22K followers, [----] engagements

"I'm running my first in-person retreat this August It's a deep-dive on attachment theory through the lens of Radical Honesty & Shadow work. It'll be near Boulder Colorado (my favorite place) co-hosted by two people whose work has personally changed my life. We're keeping the group size SMALL so I wanted to launch it here first 🥰 Early bird pricing is available for the first [--] spots. https://www.heidipriebe.com/attachment-intensive https://www.heidipriebe.com/attachment-intensive"
X Link 2025-04-29T14:34Z 22.6K followers, [---] engagements

"Um holy shit we just sold out of early bird tickets in the first [--] hours 😱🙏 We have [--] tickets left at standard pricing (And I CANNOT WAIT to see so many of you at this) I'm running my first in-person retreat this August It's a deep-dive on attachment theory through the lens of Radical Honesty & Shadow work. It'll be near Boulder Colorado (my favorite place) co-hosted by two people whose work has personally changed my life. We're keeping I'm running my first in-person retreat this August It's a deep-dive on attachment theory through the lens of Radical Honesty & Shadow work. It'll be near"
X Link 2025-04-29T22:21Z 22.3K followers, [----] engagements

"One thing that I've noticed seems to unite almost all fearful-avoidants is a preoccupation with the search for meaning. When under stress this often manifests as ADHD-type symptoms: the system is desperately trying to determine where it ought to focus its attention and direct its resources. In moments of less imminent distress it can manifest as philosophical exploration (often done through writing creative work or just good old-fashioned engagement with theory). Because the unconscious mind is not cohered on what matters (the way all other attachment styles are however counter-productively"
X Link 2025-05-02T14:28Z 23.4K followers, 45K engagements

"Every once in a while I see a thread exposing how digital nomadism is ACTUALLY TERRIBLE AND V STRESSFUL and its like oh dude - did you try to do that with a nervous system that actually works Nooo no man - we just invented that to give the fearful-avoidants something to do while everyone was starting families"
X Link 2025-05-06T12:53Z 22.6K followers, 28.2K engagements

"For a period of about [--] years I made rest the main priority in my life (this was not easy to do on a practical level). My nervous system changed drastically and with that my focus discernment & execution sharpened tenfold. deeply interested in hearing from people who have made what they consider quantum leaps in personal performance and how they achieved these jumps deeply interested in hearing from people who have made what they consider quantum leaps in personal performance and how they achieved these jumps"
X Link 2025-05-07T03:30Z 22.6K followers, 406K engagements

"A lot of what people think of as anger is in fact desperation in a trenchcoat. Desperation can deploy anger in service of getting one's needs met externally. But clean anger is a different beast. It is the 'No' energy that holds boundaries in place & sets change into motion"
X Link 2025-05-07T04:17Z 22.6K followers, 10.6K engagements

"I thought the whole scarf discourse was hilarious and deeply silly and then had a full five hour argument with someone I know irl about it and am now convinced the topic has some mystical argument-inducing curse baked into it bc why are we all losing our minds including me"
X Link 2025-05-17T20:07Z 22.6K followers, 131.2K engagements

"I cannot express how excited I'm getting about this based on how many of my mutuals have signed up for it 😭🤩. I think I'm not going to launch it to my Youtube audience at all this round I'm sooo into the tpot vibe that's taking shape I'm running my first in-person retreat this August It's a deep-dive on attachment theory through the lens of Radical Honesty & Shadow work. It'll be near Boulder Colorado (my favorite place) co-hosted by two people whose work has personally changed my life. We're keeping I'm running my first in-person retreat this August It's a deep-dive on attachment theory"
X Link 2025-05-18T23:59Z 22.6K followers, [----] engagements

"Really teetering on the edge of becoming one of those people who falls in love with ChatGPT bc I dumped a giant amount of info about what I have to get done in the next few days + what's going on in my personal life into the chat and without missing a beat it made me a concise hour-by-hour schedule of the next [--] hours that included regular breaks for 'screaming into a pillow.'"
X Link 2025-05-19T05:58Z 22.6K followers, [----] engagements

"Something I want to work on in the next year or two is making my interpersonal needs more conscious for myself (and pursue them more intentionally). I think I've long been in denial about the amount of: friendship romance co-regulation quality time and just overall camaraderie I want/need in my day-to-day life. I don't think I can or need to fix that overnight: just going to live with it as an intention for a while and see how my life starts changing shape"
X Link 2025-05-20T03:56Z 22.6K followers, [----] engagements

"@MilanMeck Ohhhhh - okay going to sit with this one. Like its for getting the pre frontal cortex back online kinda thing - not for those of us who cling to it while dissociating from the physical body as a default trauma response 😂"
X Link 2025-06-02T18:07Z 22.6K followers, [---] engagements

"I dont want to outright say Im being spiritually trolled BUT last night I saw a reel that was like whenever youre thinking or dreaming about someone its bc theyre thinking or dreaming about you And a psychologist had stitched it being like No actually that is magical thinking which I snorted at bc I agreed then went to sleep. While sleeping I had a super vivid dream of an ex who I havent seen in years and rarely speak to. Woke up thought thats random and went on with my day. Then got a text from that same ex saying theyd had a super vivid dream about me last night. Am I supposed to rearrange"
X Link 2025-06-14T22:27Z 22.8K followers, 66.6K engagements

"One of my only true epistemic loyalties is to respecting the limits of any given way of knowing. I.e. Science is one way of understanding things but I dont need everything to be proven by science to experience it as reliable or real. A lot of other things fall under the realm of spirituality and check out to me but I dont assume that means that any specific mystical framework is automatically holistically correct either. Everythings just part of the elephant (except for some things that are just straight-up invented because were uncomfortable having an incomplete map of the elephant - but"
X Link 2025-06-15T00:54Z 22.8K followers, [----] engagements

"My saving grace during these years was working with a therapist who'd had a shady past & was equally as pragmatic/street smart as they were therapeutically grounded. It was like waking up inside of a burning building & I can't imagine how I'd have made it out w a normie therapist"
X Link 2025-06-19T19:53Z 22.8K followers, [----] engagements

"I feel like ChatGPT has had a massively positive impact on my mental health so far but I also have basically no issues with tech addiction & imagine that's probably a major reason why my experience has been so positive"
X Link 2025-06-25T21:12Z 22.8K followers, [----] engagements

"Day 2: I am annoyed at my own challenge. I felt stumped and burdened by trying to figure out what to do for today's ask so I queried ChatGPT on where it thought I might need help & have blindspots around it. It gave me a list of stuff and while reading through it for the most part I thought: 'I'm already aware of that thing & would do a better job at tending to it than outsourcing it.' The thing is I'm right. Each individual thing would be better if I attended to them personally and I also don't have time to attend to each one personally which I think is a big thing that contributes to my"
X Link 2025-07-02T21:36Z 22.8K followers, [----] engagements

"Day [--] of Asking For Help: Mini-breakthrough. Today I had a work call scheduled that I wasn't prepared for because I was feeling neurotic about & stuck on my part of the project. My instinct was to reschedule the meeting. Instead I challenged myself to text my collaborators and ask them if they'd be open to using the time as a coworking session to tackle the part I was stuck on together. Felt huge shame in doing this. They immediately agreed. During the call I ended up talking to them about my relationship to the project itself. They offered perspectives and practical support and I instantly"
X Link 2025-07-03T20:02Z 22.8K followers, [----] engagements

"Day [--] of Asking For Help: A really cool coaching session. Today I did an 'attentional co-piloting session' with @nopranablem (go check him & this offering out) I surfaced (woo incoming) that a big reason I've been stuck with my writing lately because my paragraphs are lonely and want to hang out with me more. This afternoon I will be taking one paragraph on a walk cooking a lentil coconut curry with another one and then practicing the keyboard for a few hours with another one this evening. I will be inviting my paragraphs into my home & my life like little minions and the thought fills me"
X Link 2025-07-04T19:03Z 22.8K followers, [----] engagements

"Day [--] of Asking for Help: Learning That Asking Is A Skill I gave an impromptu lightening talk at a Fractal Toronto event tonight on this experiment & got a lot of resonance from group members which was cool. I made [--] asks today and am judging myself a bit for doing it unskilfully: [--]. Asked a friend if I could take him up on a form of help he'd previously offered to me. He said yes but I didn't follow up with a 'here's when & where I'd like to do that' & judged myself for not following through. [--]. Asked a couple friends if they'd be interested in co-hosting an event around asking for help &"
X Link 2025-07-06T01:03Z 22.8K followers, [----] engagements

"I love writing days that are the exact right level of difficulty. The days when God is moving through my fingers feel almost like cheating. The days where hours of labour lead to nothing feel futile. But the days where hard honest digging hits gold Chefs kiss"
X Link 2025-07-08T21:11Z 22.8K followers, [----] engagements

"Day [--] of Asking for Help: Asking to Co-Create Boundaries Something I'm realizing through this challenge is that a lot of the areas I get frozen around are areas where I need help (but haven't recognized that). I'd been putting off replying to someone for a little while & when I queried myself on why I realized it was bc I wasn't clear with what my boundaries with them were at this point (we were once involved romantically and are now re-building as friends). Instead of stewing over it endlessly inside my own mind I decided to ask them to have a conversation with me about it where we could"
X Link 2025-07-09T04:25Z 22.8K followers, [----] engagements

"The new anxious-avoidant trap is the avoidant buying into the anxious attachers concept of what secure attachment looks like & becoming more & more emotionally repressed as they try to imitate perfection - not realizing that the real work of healing avoidant attachment lies in becoming less perfectionistic & more honest"
X Link 2025-07-14T19:34Z 22.8K followers, 32.4K engagements

"To be dramatic: Colorado is one of the only places on earth where I feel the strong & consistent presence of God"
X Link 2025-07-19T19:15Z 23K followers, [----] engagements

"What is a book that you'd love to see me write Invented titles encouraged"
X Link 2025-07-29T19:08Z 23K followers, [----] engagements

"I feel like the older I get the more attuned I am to how meeting certain people or saying yes (or no) to certain opportunities can expand or contract one's life in really major ways. In a season where the weight of that feels heavy but I imagine there's some scarcity mindset stuff underlying it"
X Link 2025-08-11T16:38Z 23K followers, [----] engagements

"Have you tried locking yourself in a hotel room and belting out 'the subway' for hours on end about the problem"
X Link 2025-08-11T20:11Z 23K followers, [----] engagements

"Would people be interested in an attachment theory + radical honesty weekend workshop in Toronto if I ran one near the end of September or early October"
X Link 2025-08-15T01:27Z 23.1K followers, [----] engagements

"This tweet has me thinking that it would be cool to see a video (by you 😃) about interacting with chatGPT by cognitive function. This usage strikes me as so Fe in a way I would never think of (Which is what I like about it Gives me insight into usages I'm leaving on the table bc they're in my blindspot)"
X Link 2025-08-20T17:26Z 23.1K followers, [--] engagements

"An incredible amount of agonizing & repetitive problems are downstream of lacking direction in life. We cant force purpose or clarity prematurely but we can recognize that lacking an organizing principle is a disorganizing principle & pick our battles accordingly"
X Link 2025-08-30T17:01Z 23.3K followers, 16.2K engagements

"I hope I get to keep doing work I love with people I admire and that I can keep making enough money from it to maintain a home base and an appetite for traveling to beautiful places. I hope some of the love Ive lost in my life comes back in some form. I hope for a future where I laugh more. Like every single day ideally"
X Link 2025-08-31T17:50Z 23.3K followers, [----] engagements

"Starting to suspect that a cornerstone of any long-lasting relationship is the willingness to be consistently unreasonably charitable in your interpretations of another person"
X Link 2025-09-02T18:26Z 23.4K followers, 650.4K engagements

"I keep getting burnt out and I think its because I keep forgetting that I am only half a serious researcher the other half of me is a whimsical poet. Leaning hard into whimsical poet fall 2025"
X Link 2025-09-04T14:41Z 23.3K followers, [----] engagements

"I can't really turn off the parts of my brain that are attuned to peoples speech patterns as they relate to attachment patterns or modes of reasoning as they relate to cognitive functions (as per my first career in the MBTI world). This isn't a huge deal and doesn't really get in the way of me liking vs disliking someone wanting to get to know someone vs not etc. But it does make me wonder how many people are walking around holding complex mental models I know nothing about and probably have genuine insight on me that I don't have on myself within about [--] minutes of meeting me. Curious if"
X Link 2025-09-07T16:06Z 23.3K followers, 10.2K engagements

"I tried to compensate for the loss for a while by surrounding myself with other 'reasonable' (read: emotionally repressed) people most of whom turned out to be mirrors for my own avoidance. My life became increasingly dry and the depression started growing into a beast"
X Link 2025-09-09T17:23Z 23.4K followers, [----] engagements

"Jung talks about this in the process of 'withdrawing' projections: first we project & latch onto in others what we cannot access in ourselves. Then if we become cut off from those externalizations it can leave us in a depressive hole - the things we project are vital parts of our own psyches. We can either find new projections for them or we can integrate them. But we cannot live without them"
X Link 2025-09-09T17:23Z 23.4K followers, [----] engagements

"I think that a lot of what makes people 'toxic' is repression of their yin/'feminine' energy. If we cannot be present with ourselves when we are vulnerable (in the myriad of ways in which being alive makes us inherently vulnerable all of the time) we will need to be vicious & attacking of others' vulnerability as well"
X Link 2025-09-21T17:52Z 23.4K followers, [----] engagements

"Really hate to admit this (to myself) but having a pathologically internal locus of control is every bit as delusional and inaccurate as having a pathologically external locus of control - it just operates in a different direction"
X Link 2025-09-24T15:24Z 23.4K followers, 23.4K engagements

"Shaming oneself might allow for a short burst of high agency activity but it takes consistent high-level relational support to sustain it long-term"
X Link 2025-09-25T04:40Z 23.4K followers, [----] engagements

"Having a rough week that is partially manifesting as bad insomnia. A friend in an earlier time zone keeps sending me a google hangouts invite from midnight - 3am my time. She stretches snacks and does her evening routine while I hang out browse the internet be with my thoughts. Its such a sweet and simple form of care that I wanted to share it on here in case anyone wants to steal it"
X Link 2025-10-04T16:19Z 23.4K followers, 16.4K engagements

"The perfect encapsulation of early-stage grief to me has always been Joan Didion's explanation in 'The Year Of Magical Thinking' of how she was leaving her dead husband's boots in the hall because he was 'going to need them when he came back.'"
X Link 2025-10-04T21:53Z 23.4K followers, [----] engagements

"Nothing has genuinely helped the anxious parts of my attachment style more than moving through loss & abandonment with eyes wide open. Feels like flicking the lights on in a room you were convinced was filled with monsters to find the actual shapes that make the space up"
X Link 2025-10-04T22:32Z 23.4K followers, [----] engagements

"Its crazy how much even the worst feelings change once we get congruent about them and just start admitting to ourselves and other people where were at"
X Link 2025-10-05T05:15Z 23.4K followers, [----] engagements

"Taylor really just threw a bone to the avoidant girlies with father figure eh I am almost stressed out by how much I love this song 🥃"
X Link 2025-10-05T21:16Z 23.4K followers, [----] engagements

"I think were never truly over a person until we have a comfortable relationship with their ghost. As in: avoiding the parts of ourselves that miss someone keeps the relationship unresolved forever. We have to know how to welcome in their absence in like an old familiar friend"
X Link 2025-10-06T01:43Z 23.4K followers, 29.6K engagements

"Just genuinely fucking crazy what happens when you go all the way into your anger and then actually get over it"
X Link 2025-02-14T06:11Z 21.8K followers, 11.1K engagements

"When Id get frustrated with hard work not paying off quickly enough one of my exes (who is probably the highest agency person Ive met to this day) used to repeat it takes a very long time for things become easy. I still think about that multiple times a week"
X Link 2025-06-04T17:01Z 23.8K followers, 59.6K engagements

"Easy is sort of like the fast and seemingly spontaneous emergence of a flower within a garden whose soil has been meticulously cared for for months. Most (high quality) things are really really really really really hard and thankless for a long time before they are easy"
X Link 2025-06-04T17:05Z 23.8K followers, [----] engagements

"One of the anxious-avoidant relationship trappings is exactly this: [--]. The avoidant presents themselves as perfect and then quickly becomes overwhelmed trying to meet their partner's needs. [--]. The avoidant starts seeing the anxious party as 'not trying hard enough' (to self-regulate like they do compulsively) so they pull back to relieve themselves of the pressure. [--]. The anxious party however has bought into the avoidant's 'perfect' presentation as the whole of who they are. So when the avoidant pulls back it feels like they are just randomly denying their partner access to their perfect"
X Link 2025-07-23T19:45Z 23.4K followers, 16K engagements

"Loving oneself is too open to interpretation these days. Date someone who likes themselves as a friend. (Someone who is forgiving with themselves playful with themselves loyal to themselves in a way that is flexible and allows for grace.)"
X Link 2025-10-15T02:06Z 23.6K followers, [----] engagements

"The way to get over feeling victimized by someone is to stop idealizing them. I.e. stop seeing them as some larger-than-life character that has the capacity to take away your pain but is simply refusing to do so. Most people who operate from cruelty or lack empathy do so because they lack strength of character. There is no hero hidden within them that theyre denying you (at least no hero that is readily accessible) but more likely a long history of pain and rejection - first from others then themselves - that will either be examined & unravelled over time or it wont. All this is to say: often"
X Link 2025-10-25T02:39Z 23.6K followers, 62.6K engagements

"This also happens to be the way out of chronic self-hatred: ceasing to idealize the self as someone who should be above making mistakes needing help getting stuck etc. There is often a stunning amount of narcissism packed into self-hatred. The way to get over feeling victimized by someone is to stop idealizing them. I.e. stop seeing them as some larger-than-life character that has the capacity to take away your pain but is simply refusing to do so. Most people who operate from cruelty or lack empathy do so The way to get over feeling victimized by someone is to stop idealizing them. I.e. stop"
X Link 2025-10-25T02:48Z 23.6K followers, 42.4K engagements

"I do not mean this harshly but to say it plainly: the way to break the pattern of falling in love with narcissists (or other low-empathy individuals) is to confront ones own narcissistic parts. Specifically: the parts that believe they have enough inherent virtue to be able to save others from their emptiness while being quietly starved of emotional oxygen oneself. Nobody is strong enough for that. Truly nobody. Thinking that we are is a fantasy that may have helped us survive in childhood but it cannot be actualized in reality. To be whole we all need access to supportive relationships that"
X Link 2025-10-28T04:09Z 23.7K followers, 69.3K engagements

"The solution to every instance of feeling lost is to give yourself over to exactly where you are regardless of your quality judgements about the place"
X Link 2025-10-28T19:09Z 23.6K followers, [----] engagements

"Grief is a leaf-blower that clears the beautiful dead things from our path so we can see the way forward"
X Link 2025-10-29T04:59Z 23.7K followers, [----] engagements

"For a long time I didn't understand what 'ready for marriage' meant in a non-abstract way and these days I feel like I do. I.e. I feel ready to compromise heavily on freedom & care deeply about the impact my decisions have on another person (and any subsequent people we create) in exchange for getting to collaborate on building a meaningful mutually inspiring life with someone long-term. Might take a little while to find the guy (or I might not) but there's something in my system that feels ready in a much more embodied way than I've experienced before and it feels very sweet to be with"
X Link 2025-11-05T06:17Z 23.7K followers, 12.4K engagements

"Yes. Fwiw I have a Masters degree specializing in attachment theory research & I believe this type of content is actually evil. Anyone who knows anything about attachment theory knows that the anxious attachers are essentially addicted to getting disinterested others to care about them and that this addiction - like any - can drive their entire life & well-being to ruin the more they fixate on achieving that 'ultimate high' of the uncaring other coming back. Content like this is akin to selling an alcoholic an alcoholic beverage telling them it's a sobriety pill. It is not help or a path to"
X Link 2025-11-06T02:04Z 23.7K followers, 153.9K engagements

"I hate flying and so every time I take a long flight the experience feels really intense like I have to go through a different dimension to get there. This year I discovered taking boats to different continents and because I stay associated the whole way it has made the world feel real to me. Like what do you mean Europe and Australia exist in the same reality dimension as North America And this has always been true And we can just go there without breaking the rules of reality Okay"
X Link 2025-11-08T23:18Z 23.7K followers, [----] engagements

"The critical tone of this doesnt jive for me but the underlying point is solid. Lacking habits (which are just pre-made decisions about what matters enough for us to spend our time on) puts us in constant low-level decision paralysis. High-level clarity is easiest to access when the mind & emotional system is less occupied by frequent small-scale decisions. To whatever extent its possible for us to minimize those its often useful. The mental clarity you don't have is the habits you didn't have the self-discipline to maintain long enough. The mental clarity you don't have is the habits you"
X Link 2025-11-12T04:06Z 23.7K followers, 11K engagements

"And then theres the other side of the coin of course in that breaking habits when we find ourselves stuck in unproductive ruts can be exactly what is needed. Discernment about whether one has tipped too far in the direction of order vs chaos etc"
X Link 2025-11-12T04:08Z 23.7K followers, [----] engagements

"Once heard someone say that when an emergency hits & power goes out if youre lucky there will be at least one glowing neon light somewhere pointing towards safety. And your only job will be to find & run towards that sign. They were talking about navigating depression. Instead of looking for silver linings try looking for the tiny tip of a golden thread hidden in whats happening. Silver linings can make you see the current situation differently. Golden threads can be followed all the way out of the labyrinth Instead of looking for silver linings try looking for the tiny tip of a golden thread"
X Link 2025-11-17T09:42Z 23.8K followers, 25.9K engagements

"Anxious attachment when under stress responds to & acts on the strongest nervous-system signal available to them. This means: for them to break up with someone and actually hold the boundary they often have to get angry enough at the other that the anger finally overrides their fear of abandonment. This is a good override in some situations of course. In others it can lead to the anxious attacher having to villainize the other person in order to leave them. In the latter situation from the other side of the relationship this often looks like: one's anxious-leaning partner suddenly"
X Link 2025-11-19T01:46Z 23.8K followers, 23.1K engagements

"Taking this in a slightly different direction but: I find all mentalizing failures interesting the one being referenced here included. I once went about asking a bunch of women whod had kids about whether they regretted becoming parents and some of the more self aware answers I got were: theres no clean comparison between having kids & not having them because having kids (on average) changes your brain/hormones in such a way that makes you glad you had a kid. I think theres an element of that same blindspot going on when I meet men who are jealous of womens sexual options etc. They are"
X Link 2025-11-20T13:58Z 23.8K followers, 23.8K engagements

"Psychological coercive control can be hard to detect because it lives in the realm of meaning-making: who sets the rigid context for how each person's thoughts actions and behaviors will be interpreted in a relationship"
X Link 2025-11-21T02:13Z 23.8K followers, [----] engagements

"Do not say deep down they loved me. Deep down is not where your nervous system lives. You sleep in the shallow end. You wake in the shallow end. Your nightmares happen at the surface. You deserve a love that is honest there too. This is such beautiful writing (& beautiful sentiment). Not the way love is supposed to mean safety. Not the way love is supposed to mean your nervous system is my responsibility too. You can call what they felt desire attachment habit fear obsession trauma-bond but you cannot look at betrayal and label it love without lying Not the way love is supposed to mean"
X Link 2025-11-23T09:30Z 23.8K followers, 36.1K engagements

"Was reading an article last night where a mother of [--] was being interviewed & she was saying parenting for her got easier (more relaxed & enjoyable) after kid #4 because she had to give up on perfection and just find a way to connect to her kids despite her imperfections as a parent and I think thats an excellent metaphor for an insane amount of things in life"
X Link 2025-11-24T00:00Z 23.8K followers, 28K engagements

"A life hack is to find at least one person to coregulate with on a daily-ish basis who is highly optimistic/positive"
X Link 2025-11-25T01:09Z 23.8K followers, 19.7K engagements

"Levelling up in life means accepting that you are now willing to look stupid and clueless in a whole new way for a while. (Because nothing helps us learn as quickly as resisting perfection.)"
X Link 2025-11-25T02:06Z 23.8K followers, [---] engagements

"Levelling up in life means accepting that you are now willing to look stupid and clueless in a whole new way for a while"
X Link 2025-11-25T02:08Z 23.8K followers, [----] engagements

"The past couple of years have been profoundly unlucky for me on a couple of fronts. I spend a lot of time thinking about how to optimize for the likelihood of better luck finding me in the future but also a lot of time thinking Who am I to not have the odd run of bad luck The latter line of thinking is surprisingly often a lot more grounding (and humane) than the former. The human condition is not that personal. I am not above ordinary suffering. Everyone hits the odd run of bad luck sometimes and is given no choice but to dust themselves off and try again. On we all go. 🏃♀"
X Link 2025-11-25T11:26Z 23.8K followers, [----] engagements

"This may only translate to the 5-10 mutuals I still have who are into Jungian functions but this year feels like one giant push to develop + integrate Fe for me. It's as though every single challenge I'm coming up against exists in the realm of collaboration intersubjectivity relational change. It's a good & well-needed growth edge"
X Link 2025-11-28T00:13Z 23.8K followers, [----] engagements

"Going through a big letting go of perfectionism arc and I highly recommend it"
X Link 2025-11-30T06:16Z 23.8K followers, [----] engagements

"Yeah. Increasingly convinced that a lot of healthy relating is just making space for the people we love to sometimes be silly little irrational dinks and not taking it personally. I used to be so worried that people were mad at me. Like it was the scariest thing in the world. And then I just got over it when I realized its actually fine for people to be upset at you and half the time its not even personal I used to be so worried that people were mad at me. Like it was the scariest thing in the world. And then I just got over it when I realized its actually fine for people to be upset at you"
X Link 2025-12-01T02:00Z 23.8K followers, 28.8K engagements

"My career life has almost always been a happy and fulfilling one and I attribute that mostly to the underlying attitude I have about it: I love work I try to do even menial tasks well and I am always (truly always) scanning for opportunities to expand take meaningful risks & upskill. Its a game that I genuinely enjoy playing even when Im losing. I dont have this attitude in all areas of my life. Notably I have historically disliked dating with a passion and had what I would consider bad luck romantically. That said - Ive spoken to many people who struggle with work and when I talk to them"
X Link 2025-12-21T17:10Z 23.8K followers, 13.9K engagements

"New year same priorities"
X Link 2026-01-03T20:49Z 23.8K followers, [----] engagements

"Have you tried having fun about the problem"
X Link 2026-01-04T05:28Z 23.8K followers, 32.3K engagements

"May be a social circle bias but a problem I see more pervasively in my own life + many of my female friends lives (that being naively ambitious) is being the primary breadwinner and having to support their male partners + do all the saving for family life which necessarily delays its onset. The only time this hasnt been the situation Ive been in is when I was dating another woman. And Im not super rich"
X Link 2026-01-04T21:29Z 23.8K followers, [----] engagements

"I'm starting [----] feeling super rich in friendships work and future possibilities. Far cry from the isolation and depression that kicked off my [----]. A year can go a long way. Can't wait to see what happens with this next one"
X Link 2026-01-05T02:02Z 23.8K followers, [----] engagements

"Spiritual practice is working when it changes your sense of what's possible." 💛 Reminds me of Marianne Williamsons A miracle is a change in perspective. "Make meditation the first thing you do when you wake up and the last thing you do before you go to sleep." "That's impossible because reasons." "Yes I am giving you this instruction exactly because I want you to engage with those patterns and find ways around them." "Use "Make meditation the first thing you do when you wake up and the last thing you do before you go to sleep." "That's impossible because reasons." "Yes I am giving you this"
X Link 2025-12-09T17:27Z 23.8K followers, [----] engagements

"RT @JamesClear: Life rarely changes in a positive way without an increase in responsibility. That can mean taking ownership of your health"
X Link 2026-01-30T22:56Z 23.8K followers, [---] engagements

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