@GovernorAnne Avatar @GovernorAnne Anne 🐗🐍🦃

Anne 🐗🐍🦃 posts on X about in the, if you, maga, neil diamond the most. They currently have [-----] followers and [---] posts still getting attention that total [-------] engagements in the last [--] hours.

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Social Influence

Social category influence technology brands 8% musicians 6% social networks 5% finance 5% stocks 3% countries 2% gaming 1% celebrities 1%

Social topic influence in the 11%, if you 6%, maga 4%, neil diamond 4%, me in 3%, ai 3%, guess 3%, call me 2%, blue 2%, tiktok 2%

Top accounts mentioned or mentioned by @kimonokomodo @cocteaumom @irreverentdave2 @deserteon @squirtbeetle @meadqueen @neerajadeshp @cljack @keysmashbandit @apostolicus @garrettarcher @kmagyolo @emilykmay @ghosthecklers @abc15 @oliveegger @codemom @sgodofsk @uschickadee @saralfowler

Top assets mentioned Intuit Inc. (INTU) Alphabet Inc Class A (GOOGL)

Top Social Posts

Top posts by engagements in the last [--] hours

"Living [---] miles from my ex boyfriend was convenient when we were dating but now it just means hell call me out of the blue like so what are you getting at Sherwin-Williams just saw you pull in"
X Link 2026-01-24T19:34Z [----] followers, [----] engagements

"@Kimono_komodo Even more off-putting Taurus Judge loaded with .410 shotgun shells"
X Link 2026-02-02T01:43Z [----] followers, [--] engagements

"Deleted my Jelly Roll tweet because it predictably put me in the blurry vision crosshairs of the dumbest people on the internet. Sad"
X Link 2026-02-02T20:45Z [----] followers, [----] engagements

"3 years ago my boyfriend of [--] years cheated on me and I knew I needed a hobby that would get me outside and I found shooting very therapeutic so I decided to try my hand at hunting. Anyway gonna try to find a javelina tomorrow here are the stars over my campsite tonight"
X Link 2026-02-06T02:49Z [----] followers, [----] engagements

"Taking a shit in the field and instinctively started scrolling TikTok"
X Link 2026-02-06T20:16Z [----] followers, [---] engagements

"Giving my BFF and her fianc one of my javelina quarters because her fianc loves cooking and Im managing expectations like I need you to know this will almost certainly taste like ass but the alternative to whatever you turn him into was being eaten alive by a pack of coyotes"
X Link 2026-02-08T01:21Z [----] followers, [----] engagements

"This video is very cute but the entire time I was distracted by how fruity the dad is in his little matching jammie set and then the son started talking and I was like oh no him too Kids will really sleep through enything when they feel safe 🥹 https://t.co/l0n4XEd9KO Kids will really sleep through enything when they feel safe 🥹 https://t.co/l0n4XEd9KO"
X Link 2026-02-08T17:25Z [----] followers, 12.9K engagements

"Ah yes the two types of men: creeps and defenders of creeps Hay [--] tipos de personas en la Sper Bowl https://t.co/YdFDugM9UO Hay [--] tipos de personas en la Sper Bowl https://t.co/YdFDugM9UO"
X Link 2026-02-09T02:47Z [----] followers, [----] engagements

"Its been [--] days and I still keep tearing up with pride because I finally had a successful big game hunt after [--] years of trying and failing so hard"
X Link 2026-02-09T03:50Z [----] followers, [---] engagements

"MAGA family group text that is primarily used so everybody in the family can call me soft and ask if Im triggered by AI Christian rap songs about the constitution got mysteriously quiet when I sent them my grip and grin with the caption You guys get anything yet this season"
X Link 2026-02-09T16:19Z [----] followers, [---] engagements

"And I will be watching the hell out of his GoPro footage on my next lunch break 🚨#TrafficAlert🚨 Southbound Scottsdale Rd will be CLOSED at Camelback Rd while we assist fire crews with a water rescue of an adult man in the canal who appears to currently be in there by choice. https://t.co/WqrAeX5Vq9 🚨#TrafficAlert🚨 Southbound Scottsdale Rd will be CLOSED at Camelback Rd while we assist fire crews with a water rescue of an adult man in the canal who appears to currently be in there by choice. https://t.co/WqrAeX5Vq9"
X Link 2026-02-09T19:48Z [----] followers, [---] engagements

"Tonight we will be experimenting with Steve Rinellas fusion recipe of javelina kimchi tacos. Since my BFF has one of the four legs this recipe will put me at one leg down two to go. Will report back in a couple hours. Later this week: javelina cochinita pibil"
X Link 2026-02-09T23:52Z [----] followers, [----] engagements

"Just a heads up for any of you who might shoot a javelina later that recipe where the author says he cooked it with a young sow and it only took [--] hours for her to break down in the crockpot does NOT apply to your old boar who will take [--] hours Javelina tacos for breakfast"
X Link 2026-02-10T16:37Z [----] followers, [---] engagements

"@neerajadeshp What can I say theres something really rewarding about finding non-monogamous males when theyre at their horniest tricking them into coming your way by presenting yourself as an opportunity for infidelity and then shooting and eating them. Not sure what thats about"
X Link 2026-02-10T18:13Z [----] followers, [---] engagements

"At practice today the teens I coach were talking about how Noah Kahan floor tickets are $1000 and I said Ive only spent that kinda money for Ben Folds and they said Who is that Anyway ladies who are we going to for botox and upper blephs"
X Link 2026-02-11T07:52Z [----] followers, [---] engagements

"New license plate arrived just in time for me to feel like I earned it"
X Link 2026-02-11T19:19Z [----] followers, [----] engagements

"@cljack Yep my mom was always incredibly open with us that she loved us but she did not find parenting enjoyable or fulfilling and she found childrens activities mind numbing and boring and guess who is now asking her two childless children in their 30s where her grandkids are"
X Link 2026-02-11T20:26Z [----] followers, [----] engagements

"Would love to know what sin I committed in a past life as like a corrupt Wild West sheriff or something to make my karmic debt living a life as a resist lib feminist but the only women who like me are right-wing moms on the internet"
X Link 2026-02-11T21:53Z [----] followers, [----] engagements

"Sorry Im just having my weekly breakdown crashout where I get stressed out that all of my friends are engaged and I still have to take out my own trash and pull my own weeds and its not fair and I dont want to do boy chores"
X Link 2026-02-08T18:28Z [----] followers, [---] engagements

"Btw I went to a Neil Diamond impersonator show in Laughlin Nevada like [--] weeks ago that was funnier than this At least the Neil Diamond impersonator in Laughlin had a moment where he went who in here has had a HIP REPLACEMENT Yeah I thought itd be a lot of you andy samberg is meal diamond in the new hellmann's super bowl ad https://t.co/CyOXuL1J8Y andy samberg is meal diamond in the new hellmann's super bowl ad https://t.co/CyOXuL1J8Y"
X Link 2026-02-09T04:42Z [----] followers, [----] engagements

"6.5/10. The recipe itself and the sauce the meat was cooked in was phenomenal and I would highly recommend trying it with proper pork but this old boar didnt have an ounce of fat on his hindquarters and even [--] hours in the slow cooker couldnt fix that Tonight we will be experimenting with Steve Rinellas fusion recipe of javelina kimchi tacos. Since my BFF has one of the four legs this recipe will put me at one leg down two to go. Will report back in a couple hours. Later this week: javelina cochinita pibil https://t.co/ghle9EZ4y6 Tonight we will be experimenting with Steve Rinellas fusion"
X Link 2026-02-10T18:03Z [----] followers, 27.5K engagements

"Making the most populous city in each region the capital except for one 🙄 Reimagining The United States As Only [--] States With New Names & State Capitals Other combinations: https://t.co/DnL4hncf8X https://t.co/K6L5lwDjvq Reimagining The United States As Only [--] States With New Names & State Capitals Other combinations: https://t.co/DnL4hncf8X https://t.co/K6L5lwDjvq"
X Link 2026-02-10T19:34Z [----] followers, [----] engagements

"I never know what to do when a man sends me a picture of himself. Like ok. Thanks. That is indeed what you look like. This has not purchased me anything nor fixed any mechanical problems nor given me an orgasm. What do you want me to do with this"
X Link 2026-02-13T12:12Z [----] followers, 17.8K engagements

"Went back to the pool bar tonight still in my camo. He was there. I have to give him credit for his pickup line which was gesturing at my outfit Ive been wearing for [--] hours and saying I dont care what anybody says you look just the same as you did the first day I met you Played pool with a guy at the only bar in town yesterday and we exchanged numbers. He texted me to ask if I am doing anything Friday or Saturday night. Dawg I am here on a hunting trip. I do not have access to running water. You do not want to be down there right now dude Played pool with a guy at the only bar in town"
X Link 2026-02-15T01:54Z [----] followers, 1.4M engagements

"Get into desert hunting if you want to learn what a 12-3-30 would be like if it lasted for [--] days and its all on loose gravel and when its warm there are snakes and the alternative to using a trekking pole is learning what one of your bones looks like"
X Link 2026-02-13T22:58Z [----] followers, [----] engagements

"It is physically impossible for me to walk past these without grumbling venomous"
X Link 2026-02-16T00:16Z [----] followers, [----] engagements

"All my love to mothers and their babies but the moment your gender reveal cake says its a boy Im moving out of your village Animal Crossing style"
X Link 2026-01-09T16:00Z [----] followers, [----] engagements

"I love that the Waymo business model is instead of employing real people we will pay out multimillion dollar settlements every couple weeks every time one of our robot cars drives directly onto the light rail tracks"
X Link 2026-01-09T20:54Z [----] followers, [----] engagements

"@keysmashbandit Oh Im sure it is I dont dispute that at all lmaoI still hate those little soulless things and am tired of them getting all weird whenever it rains here smh"
X Link 2026-01-09T21:51Z [----] followers, [---] engagements

"I wanna go play pool but I also know theres no way I can survive billiards with my buddies until Ive gone at least a week (otherwise Id feel bad cheating so soon) So to deodorize your dishwasher put a dishwasher safe container with [--] cups white vinegar on the top rack then First Friday of Dry jAnneuary: this evening I learned my dishwasher has a filter and then I cleaned it for fun 🫩 First Friday of Dry jAnneuary: this evening I learned my dishwasher has a filter and then I cleaned it for fun 🫩"
X Link 2026-01-10T02:42Z [----] followers, [---] engagements

"Quitting alcohol is easy and whatever but quitting the dive bar pool table scene is like in the His Dark Materials series when they cut the weird soul animals off of the kids and effectively lobotomize them"
X Link 2026-01-10T02:50Z [----] followers, [---] engagements

"@apostolicus Run a hot rinse cycle. Then having rinsed out the vinegar now you cover the bottom in baking soda and run a rinse cycle with the baking soda. (Do not do at the same time) This worked for making the interior sparkly. Not sure if odor went away bc I dont have a sense of smell"
X Link 2026-01-10T06:50Z [----] followers, [--] engagements

"Theres a really great taco place a couple miles from my house called Just Tacos and More and since the and more is antithetical to the concept of it just being tacos one can only assume then that the tacos themselves are just"
X Link 2026-01-10T15:54Z [----] followers, 265.8K engagements

"Coaching in a different classroom today. Saw a box of glue sticks and crayons and said What kind of education are you guys getting here doing arts and crafts in class And the room got real quiet before one of my girls said Coach Anne this is the remedial English classroom"
X Link 2026-01-10T18:13Z [----] followers, 127.3K engagements

"@Garrett_Archer Hiking across the desert in the dark of the night with nothing to my name but the clothes on my back only to throw it all away because of my strongly held opinions about who our superintendent ought to be"
X Link 2026-01-10T19:58Z [----] followers, [---] engagements

"@KMAG_YOLO Much bigger than the picture makes it look too probably about 38x20 I wanna say"
X Link 2026-01-10T21:09Z [----] followers, [--] engagements

"As ICE descends upon Arizona something that will be interesting (morbidly sonot trying to downplay how gross this is) over the next few weeks will be how ICE moves in swing state AZ (where the Latino vote esp the male Latino vote is a huge help to MAGA) versus solid blue MN"
X Link 2026-01-10T23:40Z [----] followers, [----] engagements

"This tweet is getting more and more popular every time I pick up my phone so if you are in PHX support your local family-owned businesses: https://www.justtacosandmore.com/ https://www.justtacosandmore.com/"
X Link 2026-01-11T05:14Z [----] followers, 17.1K engagements

"If my dog bit my child Id take it to the gravel pit so shes a better person than me I guess Awful Jennifer Lawrence slammed for rehoming dog who bit her child: This is so disappointing https://t.co/FTCWC9lhbp https://t.co/ifXwlt9wbJ Awful Jennifer Lawrence slammed for rehoming dog who bit her child: This is so disappointing https://t.co/FTCWC9lhbp https://t.co/ifXwlt9wbJ"
X Link 2026-01-11T19:12Z [----] followers, [---] engagements

"Toying around with a potential bit where I act just as insane and unreasonable about Bosa Donuts as east coasters do about Dunkin. Like oh my Goddd the day hasnt started until Ive had my Bosa. Do you guys wanna hit up a Bosa on the way there Only real Bosa heads understand"
X Link 2026-01-12T17:10Z [----] followers, [---] engagements

"Thanks Citizen app"
X Link 2026-01-12T19:57Z [----] followers, [----] engagements

"There does not need to be AP shop because you dont go to college for carpentry. We also do not have AP Home Ec or AP Welding for the same reason. This is just bizarre My Fellow Americans grandstanding There's no AP credit available for shop classes so lots of kids have to give up something they're really good at to keep their college applications competitive. I got an amendment included in the LHHSE Appropriations bill to expand options for college credit for technical https://t.co/F9bKHNCipE There's no AP credit available for shop classes so lots of kids have to give up something they're"
X Link 2026-01-13T07:21Z [----] followers, [----] engagements

"Democracy is lucky I have a couple of morals left because God I would be SUCH a good right-wing grifter"
X Link 2026-01-13T19:35Z [----] followers, [----] engagements

"@Kimono_komodo Never once in the [--] years shes been sick lol. Like literally not one time"
X Link 2026-01-13T20:09Z [----] followers, 84.7K engagements

"I literally do not date men who have dogs that will live through what is left of my fertility window. It is insane to me that women are expected to deal with a baby and a dog at the same time it is a feminist hill I will die on yes I am that woke I genuinely cannot comprehend having multiple small children to take care of and then thinking what if we add a literal animal into the mix I genuinely cannot comprehend having multiple small children to take care of and then thinking what if we add a literal animal into the mix"
X Link 2026-01-14T17:33Z [----] followers, [---] engagements

"Deeply inappropriate to associate people with their cousins behavior. Imagine if I got a new job and the announcement was like and her cousin Shawn dropped out of Seattle U by the way Luigi Mangiones cousin signs with Brooklyn FC as alleged UnitedHealthcare CEO assassin faces trial https://t.co/k1u5PgVwen https://t.co/02ZX8R3AnZ Luigi Mangiones cousin signs with Brooklyn FC as alleged UnitedHealthcare CEO assassin faces trial https://t.co/k1u5PgVwen https://t.co/02ZX8R3AnZ"
X Link 2026-01-16T21:46Z [----] followers, [---] engagements

"AI is evil but Im not gonna pretend that every time I get an AI drama series TikTok like it was my first full moon and I was in HEAT Im not immediately seated and watching all ten minutes of it"
X Link 2026-01-17T23:37Z [----] followers, [---] engagements

"Spending a day in Western Arizona which Ive been looking forward to all week because the last time I went the hostess at the Cracker Barrel looked at me with amazement and wonder in her eyes and said Youre one of the most beautiful women Ive ever seen #Phoenix6 #Kingman10"
X Link 2026-01-18T14:10Z [----] followers, [---] engagements

"I hate the way old people eat. Die already"
X Link 2026-01-19T15:44Z [----] followers, [---] engagements

"Its better in the app I highly doubt that actually but thanks"
X Link 2026-01-19T20:01Z [----] followers, [---] engagements

"There is a type of pretty you can only be if you are a mean and insane person and it does not surprise me one bit that Brooklyn Beckhams mom and wife are both in possession of that specific type of beauty. Thats all I have to say about that"
X Link 2026-01-20T17:32Z [----] followers, [---] engagements

"When you see MAGA idiots getting really angry over insignificant or imaginary slights instead of engaging pause and ask yourself "Are this person's testosterone levels fucked up because they are an alcoholic and is it worth my time to try to reason with an alcoholic""
X Link 2026-01-20T19:48Z [----] followers, [---] engagements

"@emilykmay The recent weird trad wife discourse where they were talking about how youre supposed to embrace and enjoy motherhood without breaks was so wild to me because that just means either your husband doesnt think your labor is insanely valuable or it means hes just lazy AND broke"
X Link 2026-01-21T01:52Z [----] followers, [----] engagements

"On one hand I believe younger/middle-aged-ish people should run the country because they actually have a stake in its future. On the other hand I find it highly unbecoming to know without a doubt that the vice president has had sex recently"
X Link 2026-01-21T02:52Z [----] followers, [----] engagements

"Just wanted to point out to the far left that conservatives are discoursing about how running as a moderate Democrat is also a highly effective path to winning elections and then enacting the progressive policies that dont perform well with voters but actually make life better Look at what Democrats are doing in Virginia after running as "moderates." The legislative agenda is more aggressive than what Mamdani is attempting in NYC. Huge taxes. White men banned from government contracts. Gun bans. Unauditable elections. This is the [----] Democrat agenda. Look at what Democrats are doing in"
X Link 2026-01-21T02:59Z [----] followers, [---] engagements

"Whenever Republicans start talking about Trump like hes so agile in his old age all I really want is for somebody to throw some shoes at him. Like hold on I wanna see something"
X Link 2026-01-21T07:37Z [----] followers, [---] engagements

"Not sure what the psychedelics at the Neil Diamond Legacy Experience impersonator show did to my synapses but ever since I have not been able to stop thinking about how overdue we are for a proper 21st century cover of Forever in Blue Jeans"
X Link 2026-01-21T07:54Z [----] followers, [---] engagements

"My pool team captain is this old guy who is like a really talented pool player and he offered to meet up with me tonight to work on my form so Im either about to get way better at pool or Im about to get Me Tood in the lamest way possible"
X Link 2026-01-21T18:28Z [----] followers, [----] engagements

"My new pool team captain who has offered to be a mentor to me is also named Chris bringing the total to FOUR buddies Chris I have several buddies named Chris which makes sense because it is a very popular name and so whenever I need to refer to them as a collective I call them My buddies Chris the way you say attorneys general I have several buddies named Chris which makes sense because it is a very popular name and so whenever I need to refer to them as a collective I call them My buddies Chris the way you say attorneys general"
X Link 2026-01-22T00:00Z [----] followers, [---] engagements

"Just very sweet and awkward sputtering of She has this form problem too and I again I do not mean to be impolite we figured out some work-arounds that I think could help your game Old dudes rock"
X Link 2026-01-22T01:28Z [----] followers, [---] engagements

"Freshman year my roommate snored. Sophomore year I selected a friend of mine I knew didnt snore but then she got a sports injury and had to sleep on her back snoring. Junior year I logged into my moms email and threatened the school with legal action and got a single-bed room I love seeing all the retarded shit on the parents page https://t.co/PlZJfNIASM I love seeing all the retarded shit on the parents page https://t.co/PlZJfNIASM"
X Link 2026-01-22T02:47Z [----] followers, [----] engagements

"The broader lesson of all of this is that if you are/have a kid or a young adult in college please know that things miraculously working out for your/their peers is because their parents are still out there advocating for them however dumb and lame it is. Send the bitchy email"
X Link 2026-01-22T03:38Z [----] followers, [---] engagements

"Well-to-do rich people do not think twice about posting scandalously on the mom group like Room and board is $13k a year and my daughter cant sleep and not being able to sleep doesnt build character it just puts you behind. Karens are an apex predator"
X Link 2026-01-22T03:40Z [----] followers, [---] engagements

"Eating raw chicken is an affront to God obviously but Im not going to pretend that when Im making something with raw hamburger I dont sample the goods a little bit"
X Link 2026-01-22T18:23Z [----] followers, [---] engagements

"@ghosthecklers @abc15 Okay but something you're not considering here is in Arizona it is [---] degrees out in June so we hold Pride in the winter when it is only [--] degrees out. Like there's a legitimate reasoning behind when Pride happens here it's not arbitrary betrayal of tradition"
X Link 2026-01-22T18:50Z [----] followers, [--] engagements

"Love love love Mark Kelly so much but I dont think running the shortest baldest presidential candidate weve ever had in our final Hail Mary attempt to stop the collapse of the American empire is our best option (great VP pick though) Sen. Mark Kelly tells CNN hes seriously considering a presidential run. https://t.co/9c3isMVH8W Sen. Mark Kelly tells CNN hes seriously considering a presidential run. https://t.co/9c3isMVH8W"
X Link 2026-01-22T19:23Z [----] followers, [----] engagements

"Next pandemic when people start talking about oh no a mysterious virus is killing old people in China Im joining a bowling league. Im buying a bar and throwing kitschy theme nights every night. Im enrolling my kids in [--] different schools. Im licking the sidewalks for fun"
X Link 2026-01-23T16:15Z [----] followers, [---] engagements

"You can request a free yard sign on David Schw*ikerts gubernatorial campaign website so Im not saying that if a boy has made you mad recently you can have him wake up one morning in a couple months to find that his front yard has been Schweikd but Ive done it before"
X Link 2026-01-23T18:09Z [----] followers, [---] engagements

"Got in a fight with my uncle in the family group text about Kris Mayes saying ICE officers are in danger in Arizona if they dont identify themselves as law enforcement because we have stand your ground laws and dog-walked my uncle so hard even his MAGA father had to intervene"
X Link 2026-01-24T03:23Z [----] followers, [----] engagements

"@Deserteon You should know who your AG is if youre picking a fight with your niece in the group chat about your AG recently (and correctly) pointing out that ICE agents hitting a stand your ground state while refusing to identify themselves as LEOs is gonna get someone killed"
X Link 2026-01-24T09:00Z [----] followers, [---] engagements

"Men should not be allowed to name cats. That is a living creature with divinely endowed inherent dignity. Why did you name it Antifreeze"
X Link 2026-01-24T15:24Z [----] followers, [----] engagements

"@cocteaumom I will admit my choice of both hunter greens is 70% just because hunter green is my favorite color (and was before I got into hunting) and 30% the ability to tell my next one-night stand its hunter green. Get it Hunter green Anyway wanna see my guns Because I hunt Green"
X Link 2026-01-24T20:57Z [----] followers, [--] engagements

"Hey its me your normie lib friend who loves guns so much shes about to go help out at a hunting camp in [--] weeks. If you think someone open carrying is grounds to shoot them you dont actually love the second amendment you just have a tiny tiny penis and an even tinier brain"
X Link 2026-01-24T21:34Z [----] followers, [---] engagements

"@squirtBeetle @oliveegger With all due respect mutual to mutual and as a fellow Enjoyer Of Boomer Clickbait Youll Never GUESS What Happens Cop YouTube on my lunch break I really dont know how you watch this and dont see that this is insane and unconscionable treatment of an American citizen"
X Link 2026-01-24T22:14Z [----] followers, [--] engagements

"@cocteaumom Update: I put the roycroft on the wall and I like it as much as I always did but as Hunter Green (top right) has settled I am thinking it is the move. These are the things men make fun of women for being nitpicky about and in this one particular circumstance it may be justified"
X Link 2026-01-24T23:48Z [----] followers, [---] engagements

"@code_mom_ I was like what if a Latino man or Asian lady American citizen opens the door and ICE refuses to identify themselves they dont have a warrant and they make the resident of the home feel scared for their life and he was like that wont happen ITS ALREADY HAPPENED"
X Link 2026-01-25T00:38Z [----] followers, [--] engagements

"My mom and her sisters birthdays are back to back. In the group text yesterday my (divorced) aunt said happy birthday and my mom replied had a wonderful day with my husband and today my (disabled) mom wished my aunt HBD and my aunt replied [--] and still running marathons"
X Link 2026-01-26T19:21Z [----] followers, 278.3K engagements

"My dead dad was a gambling addict and when he died I got his bag of $74 worth of quarters labeled SLOT MONEY that aged out of the slot machine digital transition. Ive been using the quarters for pool finally ran out and dramatically said I spent all my inheritance money"
X Link 2026-01-26T23:46Z [----] followers, 29.5K engagements

"Before anybody tries to make this woke: my mom is disabled because of addiction that almost tore our family apart and my aunt is divorced because she is a terrible volatile person they are two crazy people negging each other about their own life choices dont take it out on me"
X Link 2026-01-27T00:53Z [----] followers, 27.7K engagements

"@mead_queen_ Feel free by the way to make fun of me or skewer me for the fact that I tell every young woman under my wing that criminal defense is meh and lame because men are always guilty but prosecutorial work is meaningful and brings actionable change and justice for women"
X Link 2026-01-29T07:39Z [----] followers, [--] engagements

"@sgodofsk @uschickadee I agree with this hypothesis wholeheartedlydogs are happiest when they get to do what theyre bred to do. Every day the dumbest couple you know buys a hunting breed puppy and wonders why their $3000 Hungarian vizsla is picking off endangered songbirds in the backyard"
X Link 2025-05-23T00:32Z [----] followers, [---] engagements

"@squirtBeetle Affordability is not the issue here so much as the issue is that I keep buying expensive vacuums and none of them have been able to compete with the 2000s Dirt Devil I grew up with so Im getting very frustrated"
X Link 2025-09-22T00:01Z [----] followers, [--] engagements

"Kids at the zoo have no taste. We have a javelina exhibit at the base of the tomb of Arizonas first governor and you wanna see the giraffes Get outta here"
X Link 2026-01-14T16:05Z [----] followers, [---] engagements

"You will never see me buying name brand athleisure because you cannot convince me to pay $119 for pants made out of plastic"
X Link 2026-01-16T18:14Z [----] followers, [---] engagements

"(Btw because we dont gatekeep here the ColorfulKoala brand on Amazon is a perfect Athleta dupe and theyre like $30 a pair)"
X Link 2026-01-16T18:22Z [----] followers, [---] engagements

"At the Neil Diamond impersonator show in Laughlin meet me in the fucking pit (they asked us when we bought our tickets if we could still climb stairs)"
X Link 2026-01-19T05:07Z [----] followers, [---] engagements

"At the Neil Diamond impersonator show in Laughlin Nevada turning to [--] year old men doing a Sex and the City Samantha voice and saying I need to know if your income is fixed and something else isnt"
X Link 2026-01-19T05:08Z [----] followers, [---] engagements

"This is a real review of roasted seaweed chips"
X Link 2026-01-28T19:31Z [----] followers, [---] engagements

"@mead_queen_ Ive had them for [--] years and were gonna win it all next year - this year we will just be placing top [--] at state championships. Which out of [---] or so teams is fine. Their ability to intuit nonsense about my love life is a testament to their capacity as future prosecutors"
X Link 2026-01-29T07:34Z [----] followers, [---] engagements

"Today I learned there are Papago Park is completely manmade truthers"
X Link 2026-01-29T15:13Z [----] followers, [---] engagements

"AAAAA hes so prompt help me hot roof guy Ive sprung a leak HOT ROOF GUY IS BACK I REPEAT MY LANDLORD HAS RE-HIRED HOT ROOF GUY https://t.co/KEjXvDile9 HOT ROOF GUY IS BACK I REPEAT MY LANDLORD HAS RE-HIRED HOT ROOF GUY https://t.co/KEjXvDile9"
X Link 2026-01-30T18:36Z [----] followers, [---] engagements

"Funniest thing about coaching a dweeb sport like Mock Trial: told the kids not to freak out if they see edits happening the night before practice and to go enjoy their Friday. Now Im on Google Docs and they are all also sitting at home on a Friday night editing their work"
X Link 2026-01-31T01:43Z [----] followers, [---] engagements

"Repeating the Cycle (of being a lame nerd teenager)"
X Link 2026-01-31T01:43Z [----] followers, [---] engagements

"I explicitly forbade the kids I coach from ever using AI in their writing and an ongoing joke I have is but youre always welcome to consult AI: Annes Intelligence"
X Link 2026-01-31T02:24Z [----] followers, [---] engagements

"@SaraLFowler The only time heart shot and hunt have been in the same sentence for me in a way that didnt make me happy :("
X Link 2026-01-31T03:41Z [----] followers, [--] engagements

"Every time I play pool with my ex boyfriend I have to keep an eye on how much he drinks because its really awkward when hes all I miss what we had so bad I get physical chest pain every day please come home and I have to be like [--] ball corner pocket"
X Link 2026-02-01T18:47Z [----] followers, [----] engagements

"@Kimono_komodo I just feel like even though the Judge is a ridiculous and stupid gun imagine how funny it would be if I had to defend myself against somebody and they think theyre about to get absolutely capped and instead they just take a .410 load straight to the face"
X Link 2026-02-02T01:48Z [----] followers, [--] engagements

"@Kimono_komodo Like oh you wanna mug THIS lady Hope you like having [---] pockmarks and a missing eye"
X Link 2026-02-02T01:50Z [----] followers, [--] engagements

"@Deserteon I was not joking I was making an observation. His music is ass his lyrics are trash his beats are canned he is not smart even this speech itself is re--pardon me ridiculous and his fanbase is made up of idiots. I don't care if you found this funny because I was not joking"
X Link 2026-02-02T17:55Z [----] followers, [---] engagements

"@Reboticant I went to a residential college and the meal plan was 1) mandatory 2) like $8k ish and 3) the only part of my tuition/room/board that was not covered by my need-based aid. So my $48k student debt was literally just my semester abroad and [--] years of dining hall salad bar"
X Link 2026-02-02T20:49Z [----] followers, [---] engagements

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